DON'T KNOW HOW I FEEL!
March 21: Wow! It has been a little over two months since I journaled. I guess that is because everything stays the same and yet is so different.
I have been plagued this winter with multiple respiratory illnesses and HUGE depression! I still cannot get myself out of the dark hole. I peek out once in a while, try to pull myself out, and then I tumble right back in.
I have almost removed all the clothes from Scott's closet. It was a have to thing....after 2 1/2 years, they were beginning to get "closet/hanger" marks. Happens when you burn wood and smoke. I can't stop burning the wood and I am just not ready to quit smoking. I am not even thinking about the clothes in the dresser, yet.
This weekend, weather wise has been crazy! On Friday it was in the mid-sixties. On Saturday, into Sunday, we got about four inches of snow. This coming Tuesday it will be back in the mid-sixties! Crazy Missouri weather!
On a good note, we had a baby shower for Chris and Sarah. That was a lot of fun. I had never hosted one before....it is A LOT of work....but it was fun. The games we played seemed to go over well. The cake and snacks were well received. And, in spite of the weather, the attendance was good. Craig, however, was unable to attend due to being called into work for snow removal. That was dissapointing! It was a co-ed shower.
I fell on the blasted ice today. Ouch! I seem to be stiffening by the moment! I am too old to fall and I sure don't bounce!
I am on Spring Break this week! I am so glad. I really like this break. Unlike Christmas break, there isn't a bunch of "hub-bub". I intend to finish my taxes, work on my book, and maybe, just maybe, do a bit of "real" cleaning.
So, life goes on..... I still miss Scott everyday and don't know how to get past the depression. My head knows I have much to be thankful for and yet my heart remains broken.
I have been plagued this winter with multiple respiratory illnesses and HUGE depression! I still cannot get myself out of the dark hole. I peek out once in a while, try to pull myself out, and then I tumble right back in.
I have almost removed all the clothes from Scott's closet. It was a have to thing....after 2 1/2 years, they were beginning to get "closet/hanger" marks. Happens when you burn wood and smoke. I can't stop burning the wood and I am just not ready to quit smoking. I am not even thinking about the clothes in the dresser, yet.
This weekend, weather wise has been crazy! On Friday it was in the mid-sixties. On Saturday, into Sunday, we got about four inches of snow. This coming Tuesday it will be back in the mid-sixties! Crazy Missouri weather!
On a good note, we had a baby shower for Chris and Sarah. That was a lot of fun. I had never hosted one before....it is A LOT of work....but it was fun. The games we played seemed to go over well. The cake and snacks were well received. And, in spite of the weather, the attendance was good. Craig, however, was unable to attend due to being called into work for snow removal. That was dissapointing! It was a co-ed shower.
I fell on the blasted ice today. Ouch! I seem to be stiffening by the moment! I am too old to fall and I sure don't bounce!
I am on Spring Break this week! I am so glad. I really like this break. Unlike Christmas break, there isn't a bunch of "hub-bub". I intend to finish my taxes, work on my book, and maybe, just maybe, do a bit of "real" cleaning.
So, life goes on..... I still miss Scott everyday and don't know how to get past the depression. My head knows I have much to be thankful for and yet my heart remains broken.
Replies