don't give up on yourself!

I went to work this morning and as you might have read I was struggling but I pushed through.

At a certain point, the pressure of what I was obsessing over, made me lose my heart.. it's like it tore

out of me.

I felt not so sensitive to others, very irritable and susceptible to 'giving in' to fatigue (and so I was rude to my

coworker.)

But that being said I went to my therapist today. It was a fine meeting overall but she also was kind of short 

with me - and I was short with her too. I was kind of unconscious about it - just the back and forth we were doing.

I then went to my Father's house and had a fine connection with him - but something was lacking - my

self regard - and I just left there feeling 'little' about myself.. I texted back and forth with him and he called.

And we commiserated. I then went for a walk, got coffee and pecan pie and just kind of sat here watching

the tv. I was insecure and feeling 'less-than' - that I had made this mistakes - and that the trials at work

had made me less than ad infinitum.

But then I thought, "you know what?! I KNOW WHAT I GO THROUGH AND WENT THROUGH TODAY! AND I KNOW I AM A GOOD PERSON" - so that's just it "I AM NOT GOING TO GIVE UP ON MYSELF" even if

I fall short at times. We're all subject to the winds of the emotional world both internal and external. The winds of change.

Peace, Mark