do not poke the injured person!? tues oct 18, 2011

well just called b. freind. he was an ass hole. said i said i would call at 10.30, nd i called at 10p.m. instead EWWWW BOIL ME IN OIL. he said i dont want to hurt your feelings, thats when i know he is totally going to hurt them. he said  i have these dishes to do and i could call back if i want, but in a smart allic way, so im concedering thinking it over, about calling back. it sounds petty but i know him and how it is. he is going to caatch me in just the WRONG WAY one of these days and im going to realy let him have  it and i can be brutal. i found some moore pain pills i forgot about from wene i just came ho9me, so i took 1 and a half. i feel ok, but i know the doc is not going to give me anymoore so im taking them now while i still can. trying to get ready in my mind for the going off the pills cold turky. im still very afraid, but i am in a safe place. im not going to get physicly hurt, but im prob i know im not going to be a very good person to be around crabby, bitchy and all those other dwarfs. so im doiiiiiiiing my last harra tonight and tommorow and fri i go to sergon, then hopefully he will let me put some at least weight on leg. am very afraid about that. having such a hard time sleeping, and realy eating, no appitite, which isint a bad thing its just different. its the with drwals i think. oh great. might not be on here after fri for a while if it gets ugly. i wont want to get on or anything, im thinking son called tonight. he put in some apps FINNALLY. he oif course has no food, so i have to try and get him a little money, i know, but he is my son and he has to have food, nothing else but you HAVE TO have food. maybe he is finnally getting it about the having to work mwhile in school.  ok, cant type anymoore and i want to go to my room now. back on hopefully tommorow. goodnight. hope i sleep good want to sleep in so bad tommorow, but i allways wake early now. it REALY  sucks ok, tilll tommorow