divining a future, where would it be better

This is only a little bemoaning that I am going to put down here and then put away and get on with the day.

Yes my life is limited - I am limited but the sun is coming out and I can aim to work hard and find beauty where I can.

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I think the thought pattern that I would find a better life, somewhere else, in some other job, is something

I have ascribed to quite in thought 

a lot in the past...that 'somewhere else' would be like a better life.

I think when I come into contact with my family and friends and see their lives unfolding in such a great way - I am humbled and arrested by the understanding....that - that kind of life is not for me -

not that I don't want it - but that I don't really know how I would get it... or would be able to...

I think the choices that I see for myself - I try to make the best assertion of what would be, or help me get, a better life - and quite often it means to make a move somewhere else or more to the point to make a move - 

that ultimately I don't have the choice to do. So much time and again I am faced with it.

So I think I should just develop the wool of the black sheep that I am and go on.. :)