Didn't do much today
I basically slept all day today. I woke up at 7am with horrible stomach cramps and couldn't fall back asleep. I took my stomach pills and everything. Finally, around 9:30am they subsided and I could fall back asleep. I had to take some klonopin to get back to sleep since I was fully awake by then. I slept until 2:30 and only got up then because it was getting late. I made myself some breakfast, and then watched Geo play a video game for a bit. I was going to read, too, but I lay back down and I think I took a nap. I'm still tired now, so I know I will be able to sleep tonight. I have to go get my shot tomorrow at 2:30, so I have to walk to the clinic. I'm going to try and get there by 1 so I can do some work first. After doing nothing today, I need to feel like I did something. I don't know how long it's going to take me to get my shot done... last time it took from 2:00 till the office closed at 5. I hope it doesn't take that long tomorrow.
I had a nice talk with my mom today... she was talking about the problems she's been having with her husband's son and wife staying with them. She has major problems with the wife, Amanda. Amanda takes my mom's car without asking and stuff like that. Just stuff that would make anyone mad. I don't know how much longer my mom and Tracy can take it before they kick them out. They can go live with their grandfather or something. I'm sure they can find someone to take them in, at least for a little bit. My mom is also excited about being able to see my sister at her graduation... I wish I could go but I can't afford it. I have some money in my bank, and it's almost enough right now, but tomorrow when I get my shot it's going to cost me $85, and then I won't have the money for the trip anymore. I might be able to get a ticket at the beginning of May, but then I think it will be out of my price range again. I will just have to wait and see.
I was under my new calorie goal again today... I didn't even make it to 1,000 calories. I think I need to work out something with my therapist that will help me get over my fear of eating too much. Some days I'm fine and can eat like a regular person, and on days like today I don't want to eat much so I don't go over my calories. I really thought I was going to. I guess later on I will have to have my mini bagel with peanut butter as a snack. I need to be meeting my calorie goals, even if I'm not exercising too much. It will all work itself out in the end.
I had a nice talk with my mom today... she was talking about the problems she's been having with her husband's son and wife staying with them. She has major problems with the wife, Amanda. Amanda takes my mom's car without asking and stuff like that. Just stuff that would make anyone mad. I don't know how much longer my mom and Tracy can take it before they kick them out. They can go live with their grandfather or something. I'm sure they can find someone to take them in, at least for a little bit. My mom is also excited about being able to see my sister at her graduation... I wish I could go but I can't afford it. I have some money in my bank, and it's almost enough right now, but tomorrow when I get my shot it's going to cost me $85, and then I won't have the money for the trip anymore. I might be able to get a ticket at the beginning of May, but then I think it will be out of my price range again. I will just have to wait and see.
I was under my new calorie goal again today... I didn't even make it to 1,000 calories. I think I need to work out something with my therapist that will help me get over my fear of eating too much. Some days I'm fine and can eat like a regular person, and on days like today I don't want to eat much so I don't go over my calories. I really thought I was going to. I guess later on I will have to have my mini bagel with peanut butter as a snack. I need to be meeting my calorie goals, even if I'm not exercising too much. It will all work itself out in the end.
Replies
Thats cool you watched Geo play video games its neat you both spend time together. Wow that is a long time to have to sit at clinic for a shot 3 hours! Hope tomarrow they are less busy and can get things done alittle faster for ya. Sounds like that Amanda is very disrespectful dont even ask to take car wowwww i think your mom has every right to be mad! I wish you could go see your sister graduate... my son is graduating this year and his older brother cant make it home for the graduation either (military wont give him leave during that time) its really bothering him that he wont be here to support his brother but it just cant be helped. It would be good to talk to your therapist about the thinking of restricting calories and worrying about it dont want it to get out of hand. You are right your body still need a minimum number of calories even when your not exercising as much... stay strong and dont let ED slip in there. Huggggzzz
wow, 3 hours for a shot, hopefully you got it done much faster this time. i am sorry to be so late in commenting. good idea about talking to your therapist about the fears of eating, we all know what that means and you dont want to go down that road. just a thought, when you are awake, such as the early morning time, before you go back to bed, maybe eat a little something then, you day is short to meet all the calories, it is hard i know to eat when there is no desire, but we must continue to try, myself included. money is awful, it is to bad you cant go to the graduation i know how much you have been wanting to go. yikes amanda sounds awful! hugsss