Destination Older
"Destination Older" is a direct mutilation from the still recently popularJack Kerouac classic. "On The Road." During the 70's, as the 60's extremism gave way to the 80's conservatism, the term, "Destination Older" became a popular summary of the latest laws, political corrections and prohibitions. The allegory lost its meaning as the novel grew into a literary classic to be forced on reluctant teenagers. Here in the 21st century it is rare to find an English Lit professor who will catch the allegory.
As I struggle to close the masked social distances of Coronaville, the phrase and its related conversations are verily haunting me. This morning finds me wondering if Coronaville is the veritable summit of the "Destination Older" philosophies which were the heart and soul of the 80's.
Leaving that wandering wonder be for now. . .
During those college day conversations, seeing my 60th birthday was neither on my demographic probability chart nor on my personal wish list. Many, many prognosticators predicted I would never see my 30th birthday. I was okay with that. Live fast, die young and make a good-looking corpse. In my strictly personal life, there was an absolute void of elders who made 60 look like a desireable goal. I've been enjoying senior life allot more than I ever expected to, but that expectation set was pretty low to begin with. I'm still not properly afraid of dying. I'm in no hurry to get there, but I am rather looking forward to seeing whatever is next. I love a good mystery.
As I struggle to calm my extreme reaction to closing the masked social distances with my fellow seniors, I find mysel wondering if I am undergoing a paradigm shift. Living a life of endless stream of medical waiting rooms for destination older still holds zero appeal for me, but being here to do what I can for these orphans is feeling more important by the day. Important enough to get me looking for fashion designs for 80 year old soccer moms.
Maybe? ? ? Still sorting. . .
Today I am leaving the mood icon on "Okay" because I sincerely do feel okay. Bewildered, but okay. . .
Replies
I hear you trying to make for some continuity and sense of things...My Dad used to say to his friends "Let go, and let God"
I'm not preaching to you though Arfie. I think we're all transitioning out of this Pandemic in a way - or maybe
back into a 2nd round of it. You're not alone with the existential questioning on 'where my life is going?'
And also just offering that when we struggle with ourselves, we grow...
I know gratitude helps me a great deal and I am super happy that you're feeling an important sense of mission
about the kids. You rock!! You're providing continuity for their lives by being their grandmom guardian!
peace!!
My faith in letting go and letting God seems to be growing ever stronger. It's okay if I don't have all the answers. God is far more creative. I even trust her to provide the fashion designs for an 80 year old soccer mom. It was her idea, after all. The baby's only 2 now. It'll be a while before she starts body shaming her caregivers.
I have yet to have anybody tell me that transitioning out of Coronaville has been any easier than transitioning into it, but I'll probably quietly assume they are in denial if that should happen. Let go and let God.
What a long, strange trip it's been. . .