Dear mom

Dear Mom, Im suppose to write this letter to you , I'm not really sure how to write this since im feeling a bit numb right now, yes you made me numb , you took my feelings away hell your the reason I'm in therapy right now, because of you and your actions.You know the humane thing to do if you didn't want me was to fucking give me up and give me to CPS but NO your damn pride got in the way< you made it hard for me to trust anyone,you made me believe that no one could ever possible love me for who i am, you made me pretend that everything is okay.You made me ashamed to have feelings like a regular human being.People say there is an underlining reason for depression and your the 80% of that underlining reason.You scare me because your like a walking time bomb, everyone else sees this other person who is nice and kind but it isnt the truth , I know the truth of who you really are , I must say I dont like it. I may be the mistake you made , but still I am your daughter. I didn't screw up your life You did you made the mistake you could have used birth control, you could of had an abortion you could have gave me up, but you didn't you kept me and you must live with the consequences of your actions not me! You want to know why i am in and out of the hospital you want to know why i am so screwed up so unfocused so angry??!! because of choices you made, all the people you let around me to spend the night, all times you blamed me for your problems all the times you got in my face and just screamed at me all the times you physically and emotionally wounded me.But with all these things that you did I came out a stronger person and if and when I get past this ,over you I will be even stronger.