Day 1/Day 18
Today marks the end of my fast. I binged over the weekend, which is why I felt the need to do it.
Now that I'm out of my frenzied/worried state of mind, looking back on the weekend, I got a lot of comments from relatives and family friends about how I'm looking good. I've been working out for about a month and a half regularly, and I started eating healthy and I convinced my roommates to start jogging with me in the evening to get in shape every week night since the semester started, which was the same day I stopped SI (18 days ago).
Anyways, I can't even explain why I wanted to fast, I hadn't gained much weight from just a day and a half of binging, but something about it made me feel disgusting, like I needed to detoxify myself. Day 3 of fasting has always been my favorite, I'm almost excited to go to sleep the night before because when I wake up it's the only time I can look in the mirror and feel like I look good. I don't know that there's actually any difference between me on a normal day and me after not eating for several days, but I feel like my stomach is flat, and I'm more toned.
Today is a new day, though. I want to tell myself I only lapsed for a weekend because of the circumstances. I'm still strong, I can still quit this. I slipped up, but I'm not falling into a 3 month rut. I had breakfast and lunch already, and I'm going to cook dinner then go for a light jog tonight. Maybe fixing one problem will help push other things into place, and I'll figure out where I'm going in life now.
Now that I'm out of my frenzied/worried state of mind, looking back on the weekend, I got a lot of comments from relatives and family friends about how I'm looking good. I've been working out for about a month and a half regularly, and I started eating healthy and I convinced my roommates to start jogging with me in the evening to get in shape every week night since the semester started, which was the same day I stopped SI (18 days ago).
Anyways, I can't even explain why I wanted to fast, I hadn't gained much weight from just a day and a half of binging, but something about it made me feel disgusting, like I needed to detoxify myself. Day 3 of fasting has always been my favorite, I'm almost excited to go to sleep the night before because when I wake up it's the only time I can look in the mirror and feel like I look good. I don't know that there's actually any difference between me on a normal day and me after not eating for several days, but I feel like my stomach is flat, and I'm more toned.
Today is a new day, though. I want to tell myself I only lapsed for a weekend because of the circumstances. I'm still strong, I can still quit this. I slipped up, but I'm not falling into a 3 month rut. I had breakfast and lunch already, and I'm going to cook dinner then go for a light jog tonight. Maybe fixing one problem will help push other things into place, and I'll figure out where I'm going in life now.
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