Ct Scan

I had a doctor's appointment on Friday, as a follow up to an ultrasound I had of my upper abdomin about a month and a half ago.  They found something odd in my left kidney they didn't say what but they wanted to do a ct scan.  I should of asked what they thought it was but for some reason at the doctors office my brain turns off.   I am tempted to go to webmd and try to look it up, but a trip there usually only makes me more anxious so I am resisting.  I also do not have insurance so the doctor's office is trying to find the cheapest place to have it done.  So now I am worrying about the expense of the procedure and what if they find something wrong and we cant afford the treatment.  Or what if I am denighed treatment because I can't pay.  And my biggest fear is that it could be cancer that has already spread and it is already to late.  I know that more then likely it is nothing but I can't help thinking that I have been feeling lightheaded lately so of course my anxiety goggles come on and I think I have a brain tumor.        I have also been having stomach issues, bloating, feeling full after only a small meal and feeling full for a long time afterward.  So of course that makes me think something is really really wrong since I have so much going wrong at once.  I wish I knew right now what is wrong, I am tired of waiting.  I am tired of my thoughts which always goes to the worse case scenario. I know that God is with me but I am not feeling Him now.  I feel like life is closing in on me.  I just want to know what if anything is wrong with me.  If anyone reads this please pray for me in this matter and for my anxiety.