conversations I wish could have `

I came home today from work...adjusting from 'grinding away at a job' that I just came from


(a very known commodity) to the life I live here on my own, with my cat Blue (my own very personal life).


I don't know if this makes sense - but but another way of putting it is,


I came from a definite 'way of being' to having to invoke 'my own way of being' and dealing


with that and all the insecurities and decisions that can manifest. It's not even a way of being


but a sense of wanting to know and make sense of how I am living - perhaps because


my instincts tell me that something with me just isn't right or appreciable.


I find myself indulging in a lot of things - and I feel kind of lost - but I think I gotta ground myself from this 


sense of not knowing anything in a sense of taking care of what needs to be done down here


on the ground at my house. The pragmatic always brings me back - and that - from my Doctor's suggestion


to remember what I "DO" when I get overwhelmed is something that is effective.


Keeping at the pragmatic of work around the house but also the pragmatic of work to earn a living


is all part and parcel of the pragmatic - and that idea grounds me.


I'll be talking to my therapist/doctor tomorrow...thank goodness.



I hope all is well for you guys.


Peace,



Mark

Replies

mlr0853
mlr0853

I agree, I too wear a Different Face Mask and Behave Differently when in public...especially when I was working full time. Just thinking probably 100% of people wear masks...maybe some more than others. Like when I go grocery shopping, I wear a Half Smile...a skill in dbt...helps me to reduce my stress level...sometimes even someone else smiles :)

I often find myself overwhelmed when attempting to clean my Whole House in one day. I have 5 rooms living room, kit, bath, sewing, bed room...plus two upstairs...I rarely go up there. I clean one room each day, vac/dust. I have my routine written down and a list of things I like to do...when I go into my 'worm hole' having that list helps me to 'remember' things that I need to do and like to do as a way to help me. If I'm really paying attention to my moods and catch myself before I go into a depression, this routine helps to ground me ...I really need routines, in addition to grounding they also help me to feel an 'accomplishment for the day' I try for just a half hour with a timer to 'make me' do what I really don't 'want/feel' like doing. At the same time, because there is so much to clean in the kitchen or when feeling good, with Any Extra time I have left over I'll spend time doing a little thing...like wiping down appliances, a shelf or two in ref, ceiling fans or wipe down a table. Or my porch there is not much to do, so I might just vac. Recently with my mail, I have a real problem with papers, when I get it out of the mail box, walking back to the house I just dump the junk mail right into the recycle bin.

Decisions are hard for me too...if I think with an 'emotional mind' I tend to go around and around. If I think in a "fact based mind" this really helps me to feel much more confident.

Hoping some little tid bit of what helps me will help you :) as you often help me!
malibumark
malibumark

thanks mlr! This helps a great deal!!! :) xx
SensitiveHoboLady
SensitiveHoboLady

Peace, mark! I will always be the nerd to recommend making lists to provide a sense of structure. I do it at work everyday and also at home!

It’s especially helped me when I’m struggling through a med change. I don’t always do well with routine but as I’ve gotten older I have learned to work it into my enjoyment of life. Weird how age changes us!!
malibumark
malibumark

Thanks Sensitive!!