Constructive waiting
Time has never been kind to me. It seems like I am always chasing one thing or another. And it takes time. The word someday should be stricken from all languages. It is the word of the foolish, the patient and those resigned to knowing in their hearts it really means never.
I used to feel that way but I don't anymore. I read a book called An Impatient Womens Guide to God's Waiting Room. It simply changed my life. The theme was constructive waiting. It's about what you can do while you are waiting for other stuff to happen. I began to understand myself in ways no therapist could ever make me. I started to see that time was neither friend nor foe. It was just a way of marking the days.
I don't really use someday anymore. I tend to get defeated by not knowing or seeing any real improvement on long term goals. I define my goals and while I am working on getting there I make short term goals that show rapid progress. This has changed my life. No longer do I make time my enemy. No longer do I take on projects that I cannot handle. (If I can't define short term goals for something I try not to do it because I know I will quit). And I feel all the better for it.
It has given me the ability to set long term goals and pursue them without anxiety or fear I'll quit. I still struggle with motivation at times. So I might have to adjust my short term goal to something more manageable. But I know I am still working on the bigger picture. This makes me happy!
I used to feel that way but I don't anymore. I read a book called An Impatient Womens Guide to God's Waiting Room. It simply changed my life. The theme was constructive waiting. It's about what you can do while you are waiting for other stuff to happen. I began to understand myself in ways no therapist could ever make me. I started to see that time was neither friend nor foe. It was just a way of marking the days.
I don't really use someday anymore. I tend to get defeated by not knowing or seeing any real improvement on long term goals. I define my goals and while I am working on getting there I make short term goals that show rapid progress. This has changed my life. No longer do I make time my enemy. No longer do I take on projects that I cannot handle. (If I can't define short term goals for something I try not to do it because I know I will quit). And I feel all the better for it.
It has given me the ability to set long term goals and pursue them without anxiety or fear I'll quit. I still struggle with motivation at times. So I might have to adjust my short term goal to something more manageable. But I know I am still working on the bigger picture. This makes me happy!
Replies
Awesome and inspiring journal, thanks for sharing.
Years ago when I felt like \"my life\" was put on hold raising four boys, My therapist helped me understand the value of knowing myself and appreciating the time God gave me to develope my talents. I began to better see my life the way God would want me to. I took small steps to develope my gifts and talents and use them to to not only fulfill my own desires but those of my family.
I think it all comes down to realizing that everything I do, see, touch etc. is of God. I am only borrowing it for a short time. Life is no longer about what I want as it is about what I can give.
I dont know if all this makes sense but.......there are many things I wanted in my life and have NO regrets for what did not come to fruition. I am very happy with who I am and what I have. Lots of work went into finding that peace.
NOW, that doesnt mean I dont get frustrated with my stinkin kids, but I value them as gifts from God and that He trusted me to raise them.
Life is the journey, enjoy it in every moment and anticipate nothing. xo
I love what you said here. Thank you for this! It\'s a reminder of something I\'ve been working on a lot this past year.
Did you ever see the movie *Alive* in the early 90s? I saw it back then and always admired Nando (played by Ethan Hawke). I had the chance to meet Nando last year. I\'m back in college at age 39, and last year the college\'s \"reader\" was *Miracle in the Andes* (excellent book!). It\'s the same story as the movie, but this book was written by Nando. The college gave away the books for free, and they also had him come speak at the Civic Center. It was inspiring in so many ways. I deal with a lot of regrets in my life, and after hearing him talk about the guilt he felt for calling to invite his mother and sister when cancellations left two open seats, I realized I can overcome my regrets, too. He survived but his mother and sister died. He said if you entertain \"what ifs\" it will drive you mad. Life\'s too random, and we often make decisions not knowing what the outcome will be. You just have to let go of trying to fix the past. It\'s out of our control. Live in the present.
He also said something in line with what you just said. When he was literally climbing his way out of the snow-covered Andes with hardly any food, in freezing temperatures, and with no climbing gear or adequate clothing, he said it was so overwhelming he didn\'t think he could do it. No matter how long he\'d been climbing, he felt like he was getting no where. The huge mountains were still above and ahead of him. So he had to focus on a specific rock and climb his way to it. Then he\'d reach that goal and focus on another spot and climb to it. He said this helped him realize he was making progress and to not be so overwhelmed by the big picture that he gave up.
I believe I didn\'t get through college long ago because I couldn\'t focus on goals in the present and got overwhelmed by the big picture. I\'m learning to focus on one or two courses at a time (maybe I can take more at once later), but the point is to keep working on the short-term goals. I keep telling myself, \"Baby Steps!\" Remember the old proverb: \"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step!\"