Codependence... I think everyone has had a moment of it.

Codependence can also be a set of maladaptive, compulsive behaviors learned by family members in order to survive in a family which is experiencing great emotional pain and stress caused, for example, by a family member's alcoholism or other addiction, sexual or other abuse within the family, a family members' chronic illness, or forces external to the family, such as poverty.
Codependency advocates claim as adults, codependent people have a greater tendency to get involved in relationships with people who are perhaps unreliable, emotionally unavailable, or needy.
(Which I for a year I really had feeling for someone of this nature... I even was brave enough to ask him out to go to the batting cages... I was 21 and he was 26/27. He turned me down not for any reason other than fear and some respect because he knew my Stepfather.... as a teammate on his sober softball team... weeks later to have realized his feeling for me were to strong to go with hit gut feeling. He had a substance problem in his late team and into his early twenties... he didn't drink anymore. I felt that he was a great guy. Funny, sweet and charming... this was as my mOther was telling me once an addict always an addict... even though she felt he was a changed person... that coming from someone married to one that's not sober  and was an abuser towards me.  In the end... it was 4 months of just talking on the phone on my lunch time or after work at home until we decided to go out to dinner and the batting cages... my drunk Stepfather stepped in and yelled at my Mom while she was at work and to shut him up she told me I needed to come home. In the end my sexual abuser ran my life and at that moment my social life as well. I apologized to him and he took me home. A kiss on the cheek and he's see me that weekend at the game. Nothing changed between us.... just one really sweet kiss and it would be the last time I would ever see him. 6 months later my Stepfather moved out after 19 years of hell to live with a woman he had been cheating on behind my Mom's back... I did find out the guy I liked ended working for an car or home insurance firm. A very large and long standing business. So, he did turn his life around and he's doing great.... but, hahaha he's be about 34/35 years old... while I'm 29... I think I made the right choice by not pursuing him after my Stepfather moved out... I just felt that the innocent flirting between my now husband was just flirting and nothing more.... he took 4 years to finally ask me out though hahahaha. But, my need to want to be around those who need fixing or those who unreliable are maybe my down fall. My best friend/cousin was just that.... I made excuses for her for 22 years that she was the way she was for reasons.... that she was unstable with her emotions and I kept taking her back as a friend each and every time I allowed her to start a fight over nothing, or blame something on me and me tae the blame. In the end she threw me to the side in 209 after meet someone on myspace, getting pregnant day one of meeting after a 1 week online/phone relationship then marrying him 90 days later... even after all this I made excuses. So, yes, I guess I have codependency. I never ever address my own feeling that maybe it's me who need them as well. I try to be the best friend and when the she did not act n the same caring ways meaning putting in the 100% I gave I felt hurt and rejected...)
The codependent person tries to provide and control everything within the relationship without addressing their own needs or desires, they set themselves up for continued unfulfillment.
Symptoms of codependence are: controlling behavior, distrust (I barely trust anyone but, that may be my abuse that as assisted in those feelings), perfectionism (I have to have things perfect or I panic. I feel that I can't enjoy something if it doesn't go as planned.), avoidance of feelings(I never show my feeling other that that of love. everything else is hidden and that is why I joined Daily Strength), intimacy problems, care taking behavior (I show this big time. I'm so motherly is is annoying at time... I want to take care of someone and comfort them as much as i can), hypervigilance or physical illness related to stress. Codependence is often accompanied by depression, as the codependent person succumbs to feelings of extreme frustration or sadness over his or her inability to make changes in the other person's (or persons') life (i show this so much when it is about my Mom, Brother or my husband Mom. I feel anger and rage when they do not see the changes they need to make and i have started fights over the phone and face to face about the issues. even though i am right and i have other's that agree... it's not my place and i should walk away and just cut ties or avoid them if i can.... but, i don't!).