CHRISTMAS DAY DEC 25,2011 10.30 p.m.

 well, its christmas day, i saw my oldest son last night FINNALLY, he is very deppressed, poor kid, guy i should say. he and the wife have been fighting and he is realy in pain. he is SO BIG bigger than ive ever seen him. im very worried about him. he just had checkup and he is very healthy except for the weight, he talked to me openly moore last night than prob ever or way before he got w/ the wife. she is ok, but i dont knw her. thats my fault, me and my shyness and not wanting to be a bothersome mother in law, so i know nothing. i never see him. he had to use my crutches to walk to his car his feet hurt so bad all the time now he says. i dont know why this writing is so dark now. i hit an button that i dont know what to do. so b.f. and youngest came out today and my aunt and cuz and bro. we all ate alot. i gained a few lbs, but i think that if i could go u know what, i would be ok again. been eating tooo much sodium bad for me. my girl cuz had misscaraige tonight, so sad. on christmas day. im so sorry for her. it was a pretty ok day for me. lb.f. gave me some money, not much and it wont help much, but i guess its something. he wants to go to target and get some shoes for him TOMMOROW. i think he is crazy, day after xmas at the store by the mall. and of course i have to go. ok, moore tommorow. ok, peace on earth....