building a feel good about yourself day

It's weird but I went out today and had a nice time - I was filled with new thoughts 

as well - they gave me some insight into how I react when my feelings 'do the talking'

to myself. Those feelings don't always guide me well - and my interpreter filter got kind of schooled

today (in a good way.) So I wrote about it in my journal (my Drafts mailbox in my gmail - it has tons

of writing that no one will ever see.) Anyways, now I am home and I am finding myself 

getting a little down on myself- feeling a bit self judgey. Owning it though.

It's my job and it's important to own and build a day that'll help me feel positive about me.

I was a fine art painter at one time - though I never really embraced it back then - I never felt good enough.

But now, it's kind of apparent to me that 'artists' have a singular vision much of the time and need to

to express and create - but then also that diminishes a sense of commonality, which can express itself ultimately as illness.

I am reminded of the time much like when I saw Sinead O'Connor talk about her illness - it was terrible.

But now I am alone and for some reason - not feeling the spirit to let go and be happy about myself - but I am finding

or rather seeking the energy and the spirit to just let go and be happy... I may not be as grand as others and I may have

my cross to bear - but I still deserve to be happy.

I thought or it makes me think of, how Einstein said in so many words that "a turtle is a genius at being a turtle"

and so here am I - just learning or trying to let go and feel assured or reassured in being the best me I can be.

No judgements..  encouragement.

Sending good vibes and kharma out there that you feel the breeze in your hair and on your face and

your body tingles with the positive spirit that is your gift to have. Go forth and have a good afternoon and night!! :)