Breakthrough
I had a powerful therapy session this week. She was telling me I'm not a little abused scared girl anymore, I'm a strong woman who can do what I want to for my life and not let the emotions of others dragging me down. The day after my session, Geo was getting mad at pans that wouldn't stay in the cupboard and I was right next to him and I wasn't scared that he was mad! I don't know if any of you out there know what it's like when someone gets mad around me (even strangers) I tense up and freak out. I was going to leave Geo because of his temper, but my therapist said that nobody it perfect. I've been seeing her for years and she has helped me a lot. This is one of the biggest breakthroughs that I have had. I'm trying to get myself together... I've been gaining weight again and I need to nip it in the bud. I've been okay at the store and have not been drinking soda, just water and Crystal Light. I'm thinking of doing a crash diet (2 weeks of nothing but one food, no deep frying or spices. I'm thinking eggs since they have a lot of protein and there's a bunch of ways to make them interesting without changing) and then go onto a mostly veggie diet. I just have to jump start my body to losing weight. I have been in the 230's this entire year, so I know if I can get off this plateau then I can do more. I'm in a 5% weight loss team (5% of your total weight) and it's still not enough for me to break out of this.
I went to see my mother a couple of weeks ago and it's been weighing on my mind. She has Parkinson's and while her posture and tremors, she is getting bad at falling (twice today) and then a couple nights ago she choked on her food and Tracy had to give her the Heimlich. I'm just worried about when nobody is home to help her. She might fight it (and Tracy would be totally against it) but I think some sort of Assistive Living Facility would be good for her. Tracy says he wants to die at home. I'm scared if she doesn't go into an ALF that she WILL die at home with no help. I have to talk to her about it and do more research. I had a good time with her when I was there... I was there for almost 2 weeks. We didn't go out, but it was nice when it was just her and I.
I'm getting sleepy... I will try and update more tomorrow.
Replies
Hi, Larissa! That is so great that you aren't freaked out anymore when you are around people who are angry. I have always been upset too when someone has an anger fit. It definitely affects me. I take it personally. I've always thought I couldn't help it, but now I'm encouraged that maybe I can.
(((♥♥♥)))
I am sorry to hear that your Mom has been having problems and falling sometime too. I think maybe if she had someone check on her (assisted living?) would be something she would like better than having to leave her home. At least that is what I would want to do.
(((♥♥♥)))
hey larissa, that is fantastic news and i know how upset you get!!! keep working on it and what a great release it will be for you not having that fear and anxiousness!!! i understand your concerns about your mom and i am very sorry. i agree, she needs to be in a place or have someone home to be there and help if needed. i have learned through current experience that getting parents to move is next to impossible but we havent given up trying. it is very stressful so watch out and take extra care of yourself during this time.
the weight is so hard and stress etc can hamper your goals. sticking to a plan, i was never good at that, sounds like a good idea, just dont severly restrict okay? hugs ann
Glad you were able to talk to your therapist about your fear of Geo's anger. I hope all works out for you.
I am sorry to hear about your mother's Parkinson. An assisted living does sound like a good idea.. It's great that you are willing to do the research . Good luck .
nice that you get along with your mother so well. how did she fare in the hurricane, she is near st. augustine isn't she and i know the old section of st. augustine was hit hard (totally under water a couple of feet). scary. maybe a home health aide for her? even at an alf, no one will be there 100% of the time. how about life alert, those things you wear? a lot of people get those.
My mom thinks Life Alert is a scam. I gave her a pouch to put her phone in while she walks but she never used it. She's stubborn