boring ....daily inventory of self. very boring indeed.
woke at 11:30 am EST. cats racing over and around me like Nascars........save me, help me up.
made it to kitchen, fed kitties. made food, took meds. ate. crashed after Judge Mathis. so.....awake two - two and a half hours.
woke up later. still afternoon. thirsty. fresh glass of orange sunrise. so good. dizzy. back hurts. muscles below waist on left side hurt. joints hurt. feel heavy and tired. lie back down. conk out again.
wake up, realize phone is ringing. body will not respond. hope they don't leave a message, if they do i will have to get up and break the machine. the beep is like chinese water torture.
sigh, they left a message......but before i can break anything i fall back asleep. wake up and it's dark out.
rise and shine princess. nope, don't wanna.......do it! says inner mother voice of the house. i obey. get into the shower. hot water is awesome. lemon soap and lemon shampoo also awesome. toothpaste is great.........not unhappy that i was not around when they used to use twigs to clean their teeth. i like that fresh brushed minty flavor.
fresh cotton......happy to be clean me. happyyyyyy. realize i have that funny red stripe below my chin......red stripes on upper chest, near collar bone. these red markings have been coming and going since 1997 and no one ever seems to know what they mean, is this yet another undiagnosed illness? but when they come i do sleep like a hibernating momma.
boring stuff, but this is the day of my life. sands in the hourglass.......soap slogan right?
what else. once i was up i dragged a basket of laundry into the kitchen. pulled out hamburger....dropped it into a pan, added chopped onions and salt free seasonings. broke up the meat, got out a collander. frig duty........ok fine. threw out old tomatoes, lettuce......other random dead food. gross.
oh crap, annie on the counter, licking food spoon. i yell, surprises both of us. she runs, i grab the licked stuff and add it to the dishwasher. exciting life. action and suspense. hah. if i were a show i would change the channel.
laundry is washing away, just added the blue sparkle softener. i like the smell. i like the softness. small luxuries are loverly. trash now in garage.......when is the last time i got the mail? this is friday so........some other day is the best i can do.
added ice to a glass of orange sunrise and a bendy straw. rio stole my other bendy straw.....kitties are kitties, they want what we have......love to have bendy straw battles. the call was from my az sister. can't handle it. feel bad, pray about it. i don't want to have to tell her i have to hang up after a reasonable period of time because she doesn't understand or respect that. guilt hangs heavy.
i poured half a jar of spaghetti sauce on the drained meat and onions. i made a small bit of pasta and added that to the simmering sauce. my stomach is nauseous, so i'm not sure if i should eat or not. may end up refrigging this food and nibbling on some salt free (aka cardboard) crackers. that sounds pretty good actually.
gonna put blankets in the washer next. dry the towels and pjs. are you jealous, this tale of daily boring ness should put you to sleep hopefully. so what time is it? about 7:30 in the evening. plan to work on my kiddie art project. so far i measured and cut a piece of 8" by 10" sketch paper. then i took a quarter and made circles all over the paper with a peach colored pencil. filled the page with circles. then i put random other colors on the various circles. brown, blue, raspberry and so on. then i let it sit. the repetition was soothing.......and then the fatigue wave hit. had to stop and just be.
tonight i might add more. thinking faces of children. little tiny faces.......or maybe kids, pets......? not sure, not that it matters immensely. this is occupational therapy, meant to soothe and calm. not for the louvre in gay old paree.
sara is recuping from bronchitis. she never addressed our conversation of the other day......but at least we are communicating via quick texts. glad to have that much. i wish i knew if our conversation made her mad......or if she understood or if she hates me .....in that love hate relationship sort of way. so far this month i have seen sara and debbie. two people all month. my life is rich. sorry for the sarcasm. a little self pity creeps in to the boring hourglass of dull old sand.
i actually like sand very much. did i tell you i got two sandstone rocks at a thrift store and they have worn markings in the shape of abstract hearts? pretty cool ........one sits on the end table and the other one sits on the fireplace hearth. i wish you were here......we could watch a movie and hang out. i sure could use a pedicure. poor little toes need fresh polish.....been thinking about the little massage place in the middle of the mall lately........getting a foot massage and a neck massage sound like a lottery win for tight knots and angry muscles. the mall might as well be in egypt.
this is not exciting. truly not. borrrring. i ordered a dress last night online. thinking to wear it while i'm in iowa in early summer. late spring. it's a sleeveless cotton knit. flowery print......will go with lots of little cardigans which i have in the magic closet. it has an empire waist......scoop neck in front and back......soft folds falling to the knee or just below. hard to tell , looked at it for several days, added it to my basket.........waiting a week. at one point i decided if nobody else wanted it why should i? maybe a reason why nobody else jumped on it. it is gently used via e-bay, costs $20.......buying it retail would have cost me anywhere from $60 - $80 dollars. also got a dress at ross. it's black with teal and blue flowers. fabrics that travel well, not a lot of muss or fuss. just toss them in the dryer with a little spray dewrinkler and voila.....polished lady wear. since i'm turning 60 in ten minutes i figure these little dresses will give me that lady aunt like image. my nieces always give my sister guff over her clothes whenever i visit. accuse her of wearing mom jeans and mom colors, whatever that means? daughters can be amazing and they can also be bratty. i still haven't made up a box of clothes for donna........major guilt. i have the big bags of purged items from my closet sitting in the trunk. what a sorry sister i am. wonder what it will cost to mail this stuff to her? our coloring is opposite of each other. she is a brunette with warm chocolate eyes.....i am a former blonde, now with silver dark blonde hair.......and blue eyes. i have fair skin, she has olive skin. she looks good in khaki, olive, peach, etc. i look good in cool tones of blue, pink....especially raspberry. i look sicker when i wear beige and brown......how do i know? cause as long as i can remember people always come up to me and say......"you're having a rough day aren't you hon......." with such solicitous concern. when in truth i'm feeling pretty good......good enough to be dressed and out of the house. so i tend to avoid the sick colors.
sorry i do go on about nothing. i am lonely and boring and yes, about to be sixty. got to get my license renewed..........got three weeks or ? to get it done, by 2/20. got the paperwork in order, got the stuff to get my car emissions......then i can order my new car tag. if i lived in the next county or in my case, in the house next door........i wouldn't have to have or pay for emissions, the next county doesn't require it. am i becoming super scroogey when i should be more in care of our air quality? probably so. my tag costs very little since i have a 2003 model. i am midway to the 51, 000 mile mark. not exactly a world traveler.
hope nobody reads this........i am letting the sauce simmer, it smells good anyway. but still think i'll go with crackers. think i'll watch shark tank and the show on the other channel where they go through a case about someone's murder. can't think of the name of it. binge watched nurse jackie this week. that woman was a very crafty junkie........freaked me out how brilliant she was at doing so many wrong things to herself......to others........and seemingly had no guilt, just a huge well of selfish ness.........and yet it made me laugh. i felt a lot like her young friend at all saints. the nurse named zooey........the upbeat kind girl who has such faith in people..........
time to eat, settled on a small bowl of pasta, a hawaiian roll and a pink naval orange with a big glass of juice and a big glass of water. thirst never feels quenched .......lovely meds. speaking of meds, time to restock pill box for another riveting two weeks of medication.
i am not in a bad mood, just feel so out of it physically. thankful for this time up writing. if you did stop by bless your kind heart..........you are dear, hopefully you skimmed through most of it. it's truly boring boring boring.........a lot of life is. but i do wish for a little more ark of the lost raiders. crap, annie got into my dinner. crackers and fruit it is. i am really mad at her. she had her dinner already and now got into mine. this tells me how slow i really am moving. she was just behind me and managed to eat a good bit without me realizing it. the writing part of the brain seems to be more alert than the rent a cop part of the brain. .......annie and i are in a tiff. she's probably gonna try to negotiate another nine lives contract.........but she better know i'm not in the mood.........YET. love to all, hugs cause we need and deserve 'em. sparrow
made it to kitchen, fed kitties. made food, took meds. ate. crashed after Judge Mathis. so.....awake two - two and a half hours.
woke up later. still afternoon. thirsty. fresh glass of orange sunrise. so good. dizzy. back hurts. muscles below waist on left side hurt. joints hurt. feel heavy and tired. lie back down. conk out again.
wake up, realize phone is ringing. body will not respond. hope they don't leave a message, if they do i will have to get up and break the machine. the beep is like chinese water torture.
sigh, they left a message......but before i can break anything i fall back asleep. wake up and it's dark out.
rise and shine princess. nope, don't wanna.......do it! says inner mother voice of the house. i obey. get into the shower. hot water is awesome. lemon soap and lemon shampoo also awesome. toothpaste is great.........not unhappy that i was not around when they used to use twigs to clean their teeth. i like that fresh brushed minty flavor.
fresh cotton......happy to be clean me. happyyyyyy. realize i have that funny red stripe below my chin......red stripes on upper chest, near collar bone. these red markings have been coming and going since 1997 and no one ever seems to know what they mean, is this yet another undiagnosed illness? but when they come i do sleep like a hibernating momma.
boring stuff, but this is the day of my life. sands in the hourglass.......soap slogan right?
what else. once i was up i dragged a basket of laundry into the kitchen. pulled out hamburger....dropped it into a pan, added chopped onions and salt free seasonings. broke up the meat, got out a collander. frig duty........ok fine. threw out old tomatoes, lettuce......other random dead food. gross.
oh crap, annie on the counter, licking food spoon. i yell, surprises both of us. she runs, i grab the licked stuff and add it to the dishwasher. exciting life. action and suspense. hah. if i were a show i would change the channel.
laundry is washing away, just added the blue sparkle softener. i like the smell. i like the softness. small luxuries are loverly. trash now in garage.......when is the last time i got the mail? this is friday so........some other day is the best i can do.
added ice to a glass of orange sunrise and a bendy straw. rio stole my other bendy straw.....kitties are kitties, they want what we have......love to have bendy straw battles. the call was from my az sister. can't handle it. feel bad, pray about it. i don't want to have to tell her i have to hang up after a reasonable period of time because she doesn't understand or respect that. guilt hangs heavy.
i poured half a jar of spaghetti sauce on the drained meat and onions. i made a small bit of pasta and added that to the simmering sauce. my stomach is nauseous, so i'm not sure if i should eat or not. may end up refrigging this food and nibbling on some salt free (aka cardboard) crackers. that sounds pretty good actually.
gonna put blankets in the washer next. dry the towels and pjs. are you jealous, this tale of daily boring ness should put you to sleep hopefully. so what time is it? about 7:30 in the evening. plan to work on my kiddie art project. so far i measured and cut a piece of 8" by 10" sketch paper. then i took a quarter and made circles all over the paper with a peach colored pencil. filled the page with circles. then i put random other colors on the various circles. brown, blue, raspberry and so on. then i let it sit. the repetition was soothing.......and then the fatigue wave hit. had to stop and just be.
tonight i might add more. thinking faces of children. little tiny faces.......or maybe kids, pets......? not sure, not that it matters immensely. this is occupational therapy, meant to soothe and calm. not for the louvre in gay old paree.
sara is recuping from bronchitis. she never addressed our conversation of the other day......but at least we are communicating via quick texts. glad to have that much. i wish i knew if our conversation made her mad......or if she understood or if she hates me .....in that love hate relationship sort of way. so far this month i have seen sara and debbie. two people all month. my life is rich. sorry for the sarcasm. a little self pity creeps in to the boring hourglass of dull old sand.
i actually like sand very much. did i tell you i got two sandstone rocks at a thrift store and they have worn markings in the shape of abstract hearts? pretty cool ........one sits on the end table and the other one sits on the fireplace hearth. i wish you were here......we could watch a movie and hang out. i sure could use a pedicure. poor little toes need fresh polish.....been thinking about the little massage place in the middle of the mall lately........getting a foot massage and a neck massage sound like a lottery win for tight knots and angry muscles. the mall might as well be in egypt.
this is not exciting. truly not. borrrring. i ordered a dress last night online. thinking to wear it while i'm in iowa in early summer. late spring. it's a sleeveless cotton knit. flowery print......will go with lots of little cardigans which i have in the magic closet. it has an empire waist......scoop neck in front and back......soft folds falling to the knee or just below. hard to tell , looked at it for several days, added it to my basket.........waiting a week. at one point i decided if nobody else wanted it why should i? maybe a reason why nobody else jumped on it. it is gently used via e-bay, costs $20.......buying it retail would have cost me anywhere from $60 - $80 dollars. also got a dress at ross. it's black with teal and blue flowers. fabrics that travel well, not a lot of muss or fuss. just toss them in the dryer with a little spray dewrinkler and voila.....polished lady wear. since i'm turning 60 in ten minutes i figure these little dresses will give me that lady aunt like image. my nieces always give my sister guff over her clothes whenever i visit. accuse her of wearing mom jeans and mom colors, whatever that means? daughters can be amazing and they can also be bratty. i still haven't made up a box of clothes for donna........major guilt. i have the big bags of purged items from my closet sitting in the trunk. what a sorry sister i am. wonder what it will cost to mail this stuff to her? our coloring is opposite of each other. she is a brunette with warm chocolate eyes.....i am a former blonde, now with silver dark blonde hair.......and blue eyes. i have fair skin, she has olive skin. she looks good in khaki, olive, peach, etc. i look good in cool tones of blue, pink....especially raspberry. i look sicker when i wear beige and brown......how do i know? cause as long as i can remember people always come up to me and say......"you're having a rough day aren't you hon......." with such solicitous concern. when in truth i'm feeling pretty good......good enough to be dressed and out of the house. so i tend to avoid the sick colors.
sorry i do go on about nothing. i am lonely and boring and yes, about to be sixty. got to get my license renewed..........got three weeks or ? to get it done, by 2/20. got the paperwork in order, got the stuff to get my car emissions......then i can order my new car tag. if i lived in the next county or in my case, in the house next door........i wouldn't have to have or pay for emissions, the next county doesn't require it. am i becoming super scroogey when i should be more in care of our air quality? probably so. my tag costs very little since i have a 2003 model. i am midway to the 51, 000 mile mark. not exactly a world traveler.
hope nobody reads this........i am letting the sauce simmer, it smells good anyway. but still think i'll go with crackers. think i'll watch shark tank and the show on the other channel where they go through a case about someone's murder. can't think of the name of it. binge watched nurse jackie this week. that woman was a very crafty junkie........freaked me out how brilliant she was at doing so many wrong things to herself......to others........and seemingly had no guilt, just a huge well of selfish ness.........and yet it made me laugh. i felt a lot like her young friend at all saints. the nurse named zooey........the upbeat kind girl who has such faith in people..........
time to eat, settled on a small bowl of pasta, a hawaiian roll and a pink naval orange with a big glass of juice and a big glass of water. thirst never feels quenched .......lovely meds. speaking of meds, time to restock pill box for another riveting two weeks of medication.
i am not in a bad mood, just feel so out of it physically. thankful for this time up writing. if you did stop by bless your kind heart..........you are dear, hopefully you skimmed through most of it. it's truly boring boring boring.........a lot of life is. but i do wish for a little more ark of the lost raiders. crap, annie got into my dinner. crackers and fruit it is. i am really mad at her. she had her dinner already and now got into mine. this tells me how slow i really am moving. she was just behind me and managed to eat a good bit without me realizing it. the writing part of the brain seems to be more alert than the rent a cop part of the brain. .......annie and i are in a tiff. she's probably gonna try to negotiate another nine lives contract.........but she better know i'm not in the mood.........YET. love to all, hugs cause we need and deserve 'em. sparrow
Replies
Wow, you do lead a wild life! I don\'t know what the red stripes are about. I\'m sure you don\'t need another illness. Do any of your meds cause more sleepiness than you already have? I know what you mean about the dry mouth. I can\'t ever get enough to drink to make it go away. I use a spray, but even that doesn\'t work too well. Love you. Heather.
Xylitol tablets for dry mouth are great! You put one on your gums at night & they stay there all night. Slowly melting. I get them at CVS. The dryness & the fatigue are the worst symptoms of Sjogren\'s. Ruthie your day sounds allot like mine. What exciting life we live. Lol. Wish you weren\'t in so much pain. I cooked pasta & meat sauce tonight for Frank & I. Just doing that I was short of breathe & feeling so fatigued. Glad you & Sara are at least texting. I haven\'t spoken with my son since Christmas. I texted him a few times. I get usually 2-4 words back. Praying maybe you can get out over the weekend. Even if it\'s just to get your meds or groceries. At least you will be out and about around people. I love you Ruthie.
Love you Sparrow!
\"Like sands through the hourglass.....so are The Days of Our Lives....\"
I ws not bored at all reading your journal. Even if it is just a retelling of your stuck in the house day - you make it come alive so that it reads like an intriguing novel. I\'m not kidding! I was very engaged in what was going on. I\'m sorry to say Annie and Rio are the protagonists of your tale - the little troublemakers. LOL. I sure hope you feel better soon! I\'m glad you are able to text with Sara - at least the lines of communication are open.
You crack me up! I know how you feel about wearing beige and brown. That\'s why I don\'t own ANY. I realize that my entire wardrobe is pink, coral and blue shirts that I look good in and black pants that I look thinner in. Done and done!
I just watched my first episode of Nurse Jackie and really liked it and hubby saw the ending and HATED it, of course, and it made me feel sinful for watching someone who, well, was so sinful. Not sure if I will resume or not. It is better to watch alone I think, yes?
I tend to mark driver\'s license in time too. I look at my current one and think \"man, I look FAT\" but then remind myself that when it was taken, I has just had my mastectomy a couple of weeks prior and was still retaining water, so I am much kinder to myself than I used to be.
I was just thinking about how you never see \"Romancing the Stone\" anymore and how fun it would be to watch that and the Lost Ark again. Gotta tag those in netflix.
Your pets sound way more interesting than mine. We only have a cat now, which can often be mistaken for a rather large living room doilie.
hope things get more entertaining for you...
WHAT ?? 60 ?? I slipped behind your journals and during that time you turned 60.Far Out !! We should have had an online party girlfriend.OK.loosen up . I\'m about to sing.I know I could never sing as beautiful as you but hear it comes.Are you ready?? Will you even return to this journal again?.OK ready set go . Happy Birthday to you..Happy Birthday to you...Happy Birthday dear Ruthie...Happy Birthday to you..Hip Hip Hooray.xoxo Love to you sweet soul xo