blah blah blah.

i'd like to feel like i've made a dent.  feel like the little ant that can't, the little engine that could not.......sigh, sigh, sigh.

i'm doing what i can, but am i really making progress?

how much can i push?  so tired.  so stupidly endlessly tired. 

today i showered, tidied the bathroom, the master bedroom, including using the vacuum.  go me.  i dressed......wearing a sleeveless sundress w/a light cardigan and navy sandals.  dried my bangs, let the rest  dry naturally curly and call it a happy hair day.  dishwasher empty, rugs & blanket in the dryer.  filed recent bills, took trash to curb.....vacuumed the stain where the kitty recently got sick......there is still a faint orangey peach stain in the long white fibers.  doggone it anyway.  how DID bruce get the stains out last time?  what is his magic formula?  i need to know ......

it's a gorgeous day, hot but breathable, we have a lot of very humid days in the south which makes it harder to breathe, today is NOT like that.  if i were doing better this would be a great day to swim at the pool in the later afternoon sun.  if......if only.

i spoke to debra....remembering last year when we went to the festival and stayed to see the fireworks.  it was a mistake for me to call her.......she demonstrated again that she is a fair weather friend and i need to stay away.  let it go.

i left a message for Carol Lynne last week, worried about her and all that has & is going on with her husband Richard.  the voice message was someone else's voice......not Carol Lynne's like before.  so i dialled again, got the same message.  thinking a family member made this message, worried now, who will know what is going on?  need to send a message to Michelle with the city of Auburn to see if she has heard anything.  Richard had a series of rough medical events one after the other......these events came shortly after he went through several surgeries.  praying if you can.......they are a lovely pair.......

(she's a friend from OWLS)

wrote out a card for some new neighbors on the adjoining street, the wife gave me their contact info, i got home and couldn't find the sheet of paper anywhere.......i must have dropped it on the way to the car........ugh.  so i wrote a card asking them to please forgive me and reach out again, gave them my contact info and have my fingers crossed.  they bought a really cute updated ranch in my neighborhood. 

no one from resurgens called me last week after my tuesday appt to get things scheduled.  they are tooooo slow and drive me bonkers. 

talked to AT&T and reported that the phone number at my brother's rehab/nursing home facilty wasn't working.  AT&T contacted the company the place has their phone service through and hopefully their lines will be back up and working stat!  very worrisome to not be able to reach my brother Daniel. 

sent a note to my neice Chelsea about her recent wedding and honeymoon.......they went to Europe, visited Paris, the Palace of Versailles.......can't remember all the cities they visited, but the pictures were so beautiful.......they are such a lovely vital happy couple!  Chelsea and Dustin!  so happy for them! i sent them a truffle dish and a silver pie server........she said she felt even more southern receiving that trifle dish.  ahhhhhhhh.

when i vaccuumed the bedroom the edge of my pretty white bedspread got caught in the machine and burned several small holes in the fabric.  makes me so sadding..........

i ordered a new cane, it has the typical black handle and wrist strap....i can transfer the bottom accessory to the new cane.....this allows the cane to stand on it's own.  the cane design is white with a field of delicate navy blue flowers painted on.  i've been going through a navy phase these last months......got some on sale plates made by Churchill that are white with navy blue flowers on the rims.......4 plates marked down to only $3 each.  they are lovely ......

so i've rambled enough for one day.......going to sit in my chair and try to get over myself, my unhappy lonely poor poor pitiful me thoughts.......and move  to a happier more grateful place.  need to pray and think and nap and rest and be ok with being on my own......lol, day after day after day after day.  gotta work harder at dealing with my circumstances.  seriously got to.