Birthday Blues again, for the umpteenth time
Dear DS diary,
My birthday is two weeks from tomorrow, and guess who's having the blues about it again.
That's right, it's me. And it came out in no uncertain terms tonight, in front of company.
All my dad wanted to do over dinner was ask me kindly to give him some more ideas to work with because said birthday is closing in. He was not being unreasonable. But with the way I've been feeling myself recently, nothing would have been okay.
"I just want it to disappear," was the response that I gave.
"Are you turning 65 or something?" was the surprised query I got.
I'm not turning 65, I'm turning 35. But it didn't matter because I feel a lot older than my years, so he got a response of, "It feels like it."
That shut him up in a heartbeat. I wish I didn't have to say that. But this is quite literally how it is right now.
My birthday is two weeks from tomorrow, and guess who's having the blues about it again.
That's right, it's me. And it came out in no uncertain terms tonight, in front of company.
All my dad wanted to do over dinner was ask me kindly to give him some more ideas to work with because said birthday is closing in. He was not being unreasonable. But with the way I've been feeling myself recently, nothing would have been okay.
"I just want it to disappear," was the response that I gave.
"Are you turning 65 or something?" was the surprised query I got.
I'm not turning 65, I'm turning 35. But it didn't matter because I feel a lot older than my years, so he got a response of, "It feels like it."
That shut him up in a heartbeat. I wish I didn't have to say that. But this is quite literally how it is right now.
Replies
Birthday blues, something that I usually suffer from each year.
Maybe you could take a few minutes and write about why you are sad to have a birthday. Mine blues are linked to my parents and the year before last I told my mother why and she acknowledged it and this year when I didn\'t have that weight on my shoulders I got through the birthday w/ very little sadness.
THinking of you
Hey friend...very, very sorry you\'re dealing with this again...love Julie\'s suggestion of writing down what\'s wrong with your birthday...if I could add something...when you get that written, how about trying to come up with some good stuff about it? You know, balance things out? Just an idea, as always :)
Wishing you peace :)