Bed head
I woke this morning and felt like ‘oh this is what I do for work’,
I can feel detached from the goings on around me at times but feel a great sense of universal humanity too.
I guess a lot of us don’t entirely identify with their work, I am and we are all so many things.
Moving forward seems just the option to take and slowly the value of my work emerged from my sleepy bed head.
Yesterday while driving a sister I let go of my vice like grip, on my personality, to conform, and nearly immediately started to say things that were loose lipped and careless. I felt like a third person and I need to be careful. Just stupid stuff.
Replies
I’m more aware now that sometimes a detail out of line in my interactions can make me reevaluate everything. We’re all just people I tell myself and don’t throw the baby out with the bath water
Do you feel that you have to guard your words and actions every time you are with the sisters? That sounds hard to do.
But being aware of what you say and do, is a big step, too.
Reevaluating every detail of the day is classic overthinking, though (I know from experience). You've got your work cut out for you!
Thanks GT!!!
Big hug sweetie...xo
Thanks Janet!
I understand that living in a monastery naturally involves a certain degree of conformity, but conformity doesn't require perfection. It's OK to be human. We've all said things we wish we hadn't said or wished we had expressed differently. I have confidence that you are always striving to be helpful and faithful. That effort, and the kindness behind it, are what matter most! Hugs.
Thanks Judy!
I feel like I have been shaped by working so many years in the public in customer service that required composure and courtesy even when people were being really rough.
It is needed time to feel a sense of venting freedom in a healthy space so that we can adequately communicate in the ways we need.
But don’t beat yourself up. Dialogue and difference of opinion can be respectful and wise and healthy - this is something I have been working on.
Thanks Nikki, I hope your practice will also include self love. Be thyself and love thyself! :)