Banana Bread and Donating Blood!

I made banana bread last night and brought some into work with me. Everyone loved it, and it made me feel good to be productive and add to people's happiness. I just worry every time I bring food into work that it's going to be bad and people are going to get sick. I was giving out tiny pieces since I could only give away a bit, so it might not be enough to hurt anyone. I'm almost out of it already, and I wanted to give some to my boss next door, but she wasn't in today. I don't want to go over to her place now since there's almost none left and it's not going to be enough for her family. I know her grandson is going to want a big piece, and I only have 2 of those left. Geo probably wants more, and I know I want more. I love the stuff, what can I say? Mmm... I just had a small warm piece with some butter melted on it... heaven!
So as you can tell, I made it into work today. They were having a blood drive, so I donated blood. I haven't done it in a while (I think the last time was in July) so I was able to go again. I get calls from the blood donor people when I don't donate. I don't mind the calls, since they remind me that I can donate again, but I normally only donate when they come to work since we get credit for it. After I was feeling a bit dizzy, so I stayed in the van for a bit. They have this big RV van thing that travels around the city daily and parks in sports and looks for donors. I saw it parked outside and work and got excited. I love donating blood, since it means I'm helping people. Even though I was dizzy, I was in a good mood. They even made the iron test less painful and uses less blood which was the part I hated the most.
I'm still working on the “forgiving my stepbrother” thing. I haven't fully forgiven him yet, so I'm not going to send the letter. Plus, I don't have his address yet, so I don't have a place to send it to. I'm getting closer and closer to forgiveness, but I'm not there yet. I wish I was so I could have that burden lifted off of me, but I know it's going to take a bit. I've only been working on it for a month and a half, and I've been carrying it with me for 20 years. I just know I can do it, and I want to be able to do it. I get from a lot of people that they could only forgive if they person was sorry. I wish he was sorry for what he did, but I'm not going to make that a factor in my recovery. I don't want to give him power over me anymore.
I started on the detox last night... I halved my trazadone and didn't take klonopin for sleep even though I was up for an hour in the middle of the night. I just got on the computer and chatted with a friend here on DS. I couldn't sleep because I was trying to figure out a word, so that's why I signed on. The word was couscous. When I got off the computer, I was able to fall asleep pretty quickly, so I'm glad that I did it. Plus, it gave me a chance to chat with a friend. Chatting is a good thing, even at 2am. I was surprised that someone was on that late, but she was waiting for her daughter to get home from going out with friends. This morning I continued with my detox, halving my risperdal and celexa. Tonight I'm going to continue with the half dose of trazadone that I took last night and keep that up for like a week. Then I'm going to go down another half, seeing how my body reacts I might go faster or slower. I want to be done with it soon, but I can't push too hard.
Mood today was good... I felt good donating blood and helping to save someone's life, and work went well. My new boss was happy with the work that I did for her, and I'm just glad to help someone out. I know my way around the computer system now, and that's good. I was able to look up the doctor's phone numbers on my own and call to schedule the appointments. I did have to wait on the phone for 15 minutes for a doctor that didn't take the patients I had for him, but oh well. I was just going online while on hold, since there was nothing else for me to do. Food today was good... I'm in my calorie and nutrient ranges. I had a piece of pizza and banana bread for breakfast, chips for lunch, and chicken with pasta for dinner. I weigh in tomorrow, so I'm hoping to be down. My last lowest weight was 223.5 pounds, so I hope to be lower than that. I'm also going to try and go for a long walk tomorrow if it's not raining and I feel up to it. I have to be careful walking, since I've been getting dizzy spells while walking. Stress was low today, and sleep was okay except for being up at 2am.