Aug 4th

Today is my BF's birthday. I have not talked to him since yesterday at lunch. Normally we spend Tuesday nights together since my son is at his dads but last night I got a text saying "Had another bad day don't want to talk just wanna calm down and get over it" and have not heard from him since. Now I get to worry and wait. Previously I would have sent him a text saying goodnight and that I loved him and then would feel bad if he did not respond. Last night I did not. I decided to wait and let him contact me. On one hand, I want to text him and wish him a Happy Birthday but maybe for once I need to just wait and let him contact me first. Afterall he is the one who chooses to completely withdraw and I have no choice but to accept it. It is really hard to deal with his moods and having him withdraw sometimes for days. The good thing is that I am am not feeling like I have to fix him. Nor am I letting his depression bring me totally down (it used to). Last night I spent quality time with my oldest granddaughter which was very nice. I just wish it were different. I was planning to take him out to dinner for his birthday now I do not even know if he will want to go.