Appt Today with RE
I met with my RE today for a follow-up and to discuss the failed FET and next steps. Once again, I feel caught off guard with my emotions, because when she blamed the failed FET on my age, and said at my age egg and embryo quality just aren't all that, it hit me like a ton of bricks. Of course this is not breaking news, its really more of a big duh obvious and I've heard it many times before, but it still stung pretty bad. We talked a little, and she just said to try again this month, which is what we plan to do. I asked if we should implant 2 embies this time (my clinic's policy is to only implant 1 at a time) and she said it's something to think about, but she's not so sure she would recommend it in case of multiples and my hormone sensitivity and possible complications due to age. But, when I told her that our insurance only coves 3 transfers and I need to make these count, she was more open to the possibility of transferring 2. I'm freaked out about multiples too, but I also think it could increase the chances of at least 1 sticking. I would bet you ladies would agree that I should implant 2? I'm going to discuss it with DH and see what we should do. She also suggested we try baby aspirin this time around. There really was nothing else to say I guess. There was something sorta positive, she told me that she transferred 2 embies into a woman exactly my age last month and now she's pregnant with twins, so not to give up hope. Still, I left there feeling dejected and broken hearted and started to cry waiting for the elevator. I hate that it's come to this and I'm barrelling down on 44 and still TTC.
My appt today took far longer than expected, and I was stressing out the whole time since I was pretty late to work. It just reinforced that I'm doing the right thing by telling my boss that I'm doing IVF. I plan to have the "IVF talk" on Monday so wish me luck!!
Sending love, baby dust, prayers, good vibes, and whatever else I can send to help you all have your baby dreams come true and bring you comfort in the struggle on this IF journey....
My appt today took far longer than expected, and I was stressing out the whole time since I was pretty late to work. It just reinforced that I'm doing the right thing by telling my boss that I'm doing IVF. I plan to have the "IVF talk" on Monday so wish me luck!!
Sending love, baby dust, prayers, good vibes, and whatever else I can send to help you all have your baby dreams come true and bring you comfort in the struggle on this IF journey....
Replies
ouch. so sorry that age seems to be the biggest factor. It\'s so much easier to have it be something that can be altered or changed for next time. My question is how dangerous would twins be? I want to recommend that you transfer 2. It is very often that only one of them will stick, but you also have to be prepared for them both, and I would hate for it to be dangerous for you. I am glad that you gearing up for another transfer, and whatever decision you make will be the right one!
Ugh! I\'m so sorry that you had to have age thrown in your face as if you are not aware of the situation. I am happy to hear though, that your RE has had success with a women the same age as you recently! I\'m with Nelly, I want to say go with 2 embies but not if it could be harmful to you. I have heard of more than a couple of ladies on here though who have 2 implanted and only 1 sticks. I hope this next FET is the answer to your prayers. Thinking of you! xoxo
Booo! What happened to age being just a number?!?! Somebody should have told that to our ovaries I guess! I\'m sorry hun, it sucks to be in that situation and it sucks to have it thrown in your face, when clearly you are already aware. It\'s so good to know that your clinic has had success with other women battling the age part of IF, so don\'t lose hope!
Wishing, hoping and praying that your BFP will come with next months treatment!
((HUGS))
I am sorry honey! I would definitely support transferring 2. I saw a chart once but I can\'t find it. I think ten years ago the doctor might have suggested transferring 3-4 and single embryo transfer is trendy but not as expedient or successful! Why would twins be more dangerous given your history!?
The whole age thing just sucks. It feels like a cruel joke that women are their most fertile during the MTV, 16 and Pregnant age, and if you wait until you have a career, support, money in the back, etc, we\'re screwed. It just not right. I can\'t believe your RE is only transferring one at a time. That doesn\'t make any sense to me. That she is criticizing quality and age yet only wanting to transfer one embryo, would seriously concern me. I would insist on two next next. The cruel fact is that success rates and chances for multiples do diminish as we get older. She should do what will give you the best chance for success, especially since your tried with insurance are limited.
So sorry that you were so stressed out today. Just because you know something, doesn\'t make it sting any less when you hear it from someone else. When I was a big fat fatty, I knew I was fat, I didn\'t need to be told. But when my OB mentioned my weight, it stung. Like a nest full of giant hornets!!
Girl, I say go for 2!!! Why the hell not?! I did! lol I don\'t think your age would make it any more risky to carry twins. Especially if you are healthy and taking good care of yourself. Lots of women in their 40\'s are having babies these days, and a lot of those are having multiples. Just be sure to eat healthy, get plenty of rest and exercise, and keep stress levels low and you should be fine!
Love and tons of stick baby dust to you!!!
Go for 2. You know your body better than anyone. And aspirin might help - my clinic requires it to as part of the IVF protocol to increase blood flow. (And I know clinics that transfer 2-3 if patients are over 40 (at their request). I don\'t like that she\'s so adamant about 1.
Wow, so sorry your RE said that to you! Like we don\'t already know we are fighting time and then to have that thrown at you. Well to reiterate what everyone already said, go for 2! I say give yourself the best chance you can! Good luck with your boss this week!
I say 2, the chances of multiples is still small, and you need to use your insurance money while you have it. 2 gives you higher chances. I always put 2 or more and most clinics put 2.
As for age, your going to prove them wrong! You have two more FETs and one of them is going to work.
Baby asprin is good. I would also ask about prednisone, not every doctor believes in it but I\'ve seen it help for lots of women, myself included.
Did you discuss dates today? When is the RE thinking the next transfer will be? I\'m here for you.
Gosh, I feel your pain. It makes me want to cry thinking of you getting the hard reality news. Although we want to know it, you are right...it stings.
Please transfer two. I\'ve actually done three before.
Hang in here. I\'m sorry you have to go through this.
Geez..nothing like throwing salt in the wound. Sorry your RE continues to bring up the age factor. How frustrating, as if you didn\'t know! I remember 2yrs ago when my RE said with my low ovarian reserve that I had tops 2 yrs until my eggs would be pretty much useless. It\'s always a race against time! I agree with Alana..you are going to prove them wrong!! I say transfer 2 for sure. I am crossing everything and sending lots of baby dust/good thoughts for your next transfer...xoxo
My RE implanted 3 embrio on the 4th try of IVF and I got only one son. I also took Baby Aspirin and Lovenox shots before and 3 month also transfer and I also had uterion biopsy. I hope these information helps.
I\'m so sorry. Our REs have a way of saying what we already know with IF but it\'s so bad to have it confirmed. I would think to go for two as libg as your not putting yourself at high risk and that you are willing to chance coming home with two.
I hope this next one will be the right one.
So sorry. Even if u know your age is a factor its not easy to hear. I think transfering two would be a good idea especially while insurance is paying! Make the transfers worth it. Good luck talking to your boss tomorrow. I think it will lower your stress with the process. Thinking of u.
Multiples actually increase with age. Some doctors even believe that two embryos transferred together can actually help each other implant. I transferred the very top quality embryo in a fresh cycle with no female issues ( I\'m 33 years old) and it failed. I am definitely NOT a believer in single embryo transfer. Keep in mind that embryos can split too so if you are putting in more there is a chance of that happening to. I know a woman who put in two and one split... So she is pregnant with identical twins and a single baby. If this is your last try I say go for it. I\'m pregnant with triplets and yes it\'s more difficult but I\'d rather have 3 than zero. Best wishes in your next cycle!!!! Hang in there.