Any Suggestions?
Hey all just updating everyone on how I'm doing. My mind seems much clearer than it's been in quite a while. I have let things bother me, that really shouldn't. I like talking to my friends and reading posts here. I am glad when I can relate with someone and know exactly what to say to help. I love reading comments because I usually learn something that can improve my way of life. I also like to read self help books and putting them to practice, that's the hard part but I am getting better at it.
I sometimes have problems with to many negative thoughts running through my head parallizing me from doing anything productive. I have read some self help books that have taught me some techniques to help reduce the constant onslaught of negative thoughts. I have also learned to not always run from my emotions. Cry it out sometimes instead of trying to divert my attention.
I have recognized some things that cause my depression
1. Lack of sleep- This is a key issue that I have, it is harder to realize what I'm doing wrong if I am tired.
2. Thinking that I am not good enough.
3. Worrying to much about other people and what they think.
4. Thinking about the past and wishing that I could change it. What is done is done. I have learned from my mistakes and I will try my best to not repeat them.
5. Recycling negative emotions, reliving past events in my mind, it's almost like PTSD.
I work hard on keeping these thoughts at bay.
I was wondering if anyone has suggestions on how to reduce the amount of negative thoughts that run through my mind a lot. I know many of you can relate.
I also like reading self help books. If you have any suggestions on any good self help books to read, I would appreciate it if you mentioned it.
1 book that I intend to read is Feeling Good by Dr. David Burns. I have a lot of people here who have told me a lot about this book. They really like it a lot.
Like I have said in the past. I feel like I have made progress and I am going to continue making progress. I hit bumps along the road but I find ways around them. Thanks for reading my post. I would love some feedback.
Cracked n stumbling, yet still moving forward. Drew.
I sometimes have problems with to many negative thoughts running through my head parallizing me from doing anything productive. I have read some self help books that have taught me some techniques to help reduce the constant onslaught of negative thoughts. I have also learned to not always run from my emotions. Cry it out sometimes instead of trying to divert my attention.
I have recognized some things that cause my depression
1. Lack of sleep- This is a key issue that I have, it is harder to realize what I'm doing wrong if I am tired.
2. Thinking that I am not good enough.
3. Worrying to much about other people and what they think.
4. Thinking about the past and wishing that I could change it. What is done is done. I have learned from my mistakes and I will try my best to not repeat them.
5. Recycling negative emotions, reliving past events in my mind, it's almost like PTSD.
I work hard on keeping these thoughts at bay.
I was wondering if anyone has suggestions on how to reduce the amount of negative thoughts that run through my mind a lot. I know many of you can relate.
I also like reading self help books. If you have any suggestions on any good self help books to read, I would appreciate it if you mentioned it.
1 book that I intend to read is Feeling Good by Dr. David Burns. I have a lot of people here who have told me a lot about this book. They really like it a lot.
Like I have said in the past. I feel like I have made progress and I am going to continue making progress. I hit bumps along the road but I find ways around them. Thanks for reading my post. I would love some feedback.
Cracked n stumbling, yet still moving forward. Drew.
Replies
When you wake up, think of what you are grateful for. Even the simplest things. Like you have a house, a bed to sleep in etc. when you start to think negative thoughts, replace them with positive ones.
Glad you are doing better. Keep moving a head even when you stumble. Hugs
Respond to those negative thoughts that run through your head. Use them as an opportunity to introduce a more positive thought instead.
When I have negative thoughts running.I replace them as much as possible with gratitude for what I have been given, and how it may help someone else. When I can give a smile...it gives ME a huge one, and things don\'t seem so bleak...at least most of the time...Twbooks that helped me other than grief boks..\"Who moved my cheese\" By a Dr. spencer...inexpensive at amazon...It is a book that helps you move in any direction even when you think you cant. My favorite quote...\"What would you do if you were not afraid?\"..and also The last lecture\"..by Randy Paush. It tels me that even under the most dire of news..You can have something to give, leave behind, and that is legacy. Also have a quote from Maya angelou I live by..\"Be the rainbow in someone else\'s cloud\"...Has helped me more than anything to see the rainbow...
1. Lack of sleep- This is a key issue that I have, it is harder to realize what I\'m doing wrong if I am tired.
*~ buy an alarm clock. its okay to sleep when you are tired. But not too much.
2. Thinking that I am not good enough.
*~we all have moments like this. We are unique and not perfect. Just want to share this: all of my friends were having the best time of their lives because they have a career. They seem to be happy with their lives. So what! I have a different situation. I got sick. But right now im taking it one at a time. I am still soul searching. I know my luck would come. I believe in my abilities. I am not an intelligent person but I am trying my best in everything that i do.
3. Worrying to much about other people and what they think.
*~ people, would still comment if you do good or bad. no matter what you do. SO DO IT ANYWAY. Just dont give a damn. BE STRONG.
4. Thinking about the past and wishing that I could change it. What is done is done. I have learned from my mistakes and I will try my best to not repeat them.
*~ just be sure that you forgive yourself first. tell yourself that this is a new day, new life. Clean slate. You are starting your new life today. And that is fantastic ..
5. Recycling negative emotions, reliving past events in my mind, it\'s almost like PTSD.
I work hard on keeping these thoughts at bay.
~* I guess all of us are sometimes like this. Be present. The past cant bully you if you are present. It will never win. Stop living in the past. All you have is now.
hope this helps :)
omg what i meant on number one is ( i overlooked the sentence) if you cannot sleep, have u consulted a doctor about this???
I don\'t really have problems sleeping, but I do notice how irrational I can get if I\'m am mentally exhausted. I have a bedtime now. Lol it helps a lot.
I\'m at work and can\'t get on Amazon due to the filter.
There\'s a workbook for Dialectical-Behavioral-Therapy Skills training Amazon carries, you might want to buy it.
It\'s the highest-rated DBT workbook Amazon sells.
It has a green and white cover, and is $15 well-spent.
hey I hope you continue to move forward!
Hey sweetie. I mainly want to say, because I was one of your first friends here, that I am so so proud of how far you have come. I really truly am. We all struggle with alot of the things you mentioned in your journal, but the MAIN THING? you recognize these things and you ARE working on them. Recognizing them is the key thing. Obviously working on making changes is the hardest part cause it\'s called WORK. I don\'t have alot of advice to offer cause I need alot of working on ME, but what I am really trying to do is to really REALLY focus on the good in my life and stop beating myself for everything I do wrong ( be that with actions or words ), and as you mentioned in #3, stop caring so damn much about what other people think.. cause if we knew how SELDOM they thought about us we wouldn\'t care so much. ( that was meant in a positive way ). It\'s all part of being \' people pleasers\' and I think you and I have that in common. I want people to LIKE ME.. to think I am a good person.. and ya know what? not everyone LIKES ME. ( DS is a good example of that lately for damn sure), and the fact is. I AM a good person. I have faults like everyone, but I am genuinely a good, kind person . So are you. Sometimes not only isn\'t it appreciated, it\'s taken advantage of . but you know that. I guess, I would say, continue to work on yourself and reaching your goals. Take the small steps, no matter HOW SMALL, to achieve them . Strive to always do your best and forgive yourself for things you feel guilt about ( I know of some of those things as you know ) and live each day the best you can.
and I just rambled as usual.
you know how precious you are to me.
Love you my friend.
~
Gaye
if you read self help books I would Suggest The Power Of Now . That book would help you learn to keep negative thoughts away . I think I learned more from it than any other .
So my answer to your issue of negative thoughts is from what i practice from the book . Realize that anything from this 1 second ago is the past , it\'s history . So it has happened and you can\'t change history . Anything 1 second from now is the future and we have no idea what will happen in the future and worry never effects it nor any other thought . so the only place to be is in the now right this second is your life . Staying present in now requires more than getting it you have to practice it . So when a negative thought happens to come to you or a thought happens involving the past , you stop it and in your head say no . Then immediately put your attention to something now . It can be anything but concentrate on it till the thought pass . It trains you to stay more alert and present and it helps stop worry and negative thought .The other thing is going auto pilot or mind blank to give your mind and body a rest . you learn to clear your mind of all thoughts at first it\'s hard and only can be done for a few seconds at a time . But the more you do it the better you get at it . Going mind blank and not thinking relaxes your body and can be done while doing anything .
I try to use this and it does help . It helped to teach me to be calmer and it helps me not mentally beat my self up . And it\'s helped me put the past behind me and not think about it . I only think about what effects me now . or i try and do it 80% of the time :)
Hi Drew,
Sorry I haven\'t been much of a friend for the last several days, I haven\'t been on DS . I am going through another low in my life, right now I am not much of a help as I have been struggling with all the craziness that my life has been.
Hey Man!
I answered this post yesterday, and then realized it went to wrong journal? But man, I struggle with all of these too, especially # 2!
But the good news is,, unlike me, you ARE good enough bro!
Drew, I know we barely know each other, but please I\'d like to say I am proud of you! You are being proactive and really identifying your trouble spots, and reaching out to others. And you are right, I certainly can relate to just about all you listed, or maybe all you listed. Adequate sleep is so important. Have you identified ways to help achieve that? Also, I didn\'t see mentioned, but for me, I need to be careful of my food selections. If I\'m having a particular frustrating time, if I take not I usually can identify that I ate a lot of junk food and sugar in the last day or two. I don\'t really have any great advice for you at this time. You seem to hv already read something about blocking the neg thoughts. I guess the thing that was said to me in grp therapy was once, is that \"you don\'t have to entertain every thought that pops into your head\" also \"you don\'t have to say every thought that pops into your head\". of course that was a nice way of telling me to shut up, I think. But anyway back to the first. Being the polite and conciensous person I am, it never dawned on me I didn\'t need to entertain each thought. ;) It came only natural for me to think it through to the end, and if I couldn\'t reach satisfactory conclutions twirl it over and over and over and over again. It never dawned on me, just to say \"next\". lol maybe that will help you in some small way. When I think about it its no different than the first time I realized I didn\'t need to answer the phone every time it rung. And now (but still working on) you don\'t need to answer the door everytime someone is knocking on it. It\'s ususally curiousity that ruins that one. I mean come on....is it ever really something that you say \'thank God, I answered the door\'? not for me it isn\'t. the fedex guy rings the bell and runs...so the bell, ya. but the knock knock knock....usually somebody there asking me for something. Also you can tell the difference cus the fedex guy rings once and goes. So then you can peek out and see if there\'s a pkg. But the salesman or neighbors kids, they knock repeatedly. Did you really want to throw away money on overpriced wrapping paper? Tell yet another \"I\'m not a salesman\" to come in and clean your carpet? ....sry....getting off topic. But the point, I guess is. 1. you are doing great! and 1. you don\'t need to entertain everythough that pops in your head. later :-)
Thanks for this post!! When I get bonbarded with negative thoughts I give myself just a few minutes to feel and let the emotions come out. Then I do math facts to try to start thinking with the logical part of my brain.