another day!

I woke up in the middle of the night with a hard to deal with thought.


I got up, washed and dressed and went to work.


I felt so caught up in the melee that is working amongst others.
I usually have a kind of perspective - today it was just hard to feel


at peace with others - and so I thought about it a little...just a tough day, I thought.


But then also I started to think about the mix of emotions that I doubt anyone might not have - i just normalized it.


I kind of accepted the emotions and the missed connections - and so I just moved on with work.
Work went by - I did the best job I could - 


and now I am at home. The emotions are churning - like a fire in a can - churning.


I had some lunch and now I have the tv on CNN. I am tired of political news. All I can think of doing 


is going out to buy some ice cream sandwiches and treat myself. This hot churning within is just there...


maybe I can have a good day even so. C'est la vie!!
Have a good day everyone!!!

Replies

malibumark
malibumark

I know I have differences from others. I experience it every day at work. I stammer in person and I become really quiet
and stumped for what to say sometimes. Though every once in a while I will have something to say.
What I am getting at though is - I felt uncomfortable today. I thought while working "But I can still do the job - so why not try being uncomfortable at another job (if that's what I am aiming for." I think I should just keep pushing the boundaries.
My mind seriously warps a lot of the time and I am pushed backwards and humbled by my inabilities - the mix of my ambition and reality at times. I am gonna get outta the house.
arfie
arfie

Of course you have differences from others. Not even clones are identical.

I think you should just keep pushing those boundaries, too. Nudge nudge. Be sure you get an ice cream sandwich for me, too.
malibumark
malibumark

thanks arfie! I ended up getting chocolate covered peppermint marshmallows...and cherry cider. Way too sweet - but I'll sacrifice :) hehe Thanks so much arfie. (((HUGS)))
Community LeaderSunCloudJD
SunCloudJD

Gentle hug sweetie.... I am sorry that you haven't been feeling comfortable..... Deep breaths.... I bought some Rolo ice cream today … Yummy...… Another hug LC.....xo
malibumark
malibumark

very nice!! You are so kind Jan!!!
malibumark
malibumark

it's weird but I am starting to realize today that I have to learn how to deal with who
I am rather than suss out a way of life. I realize that I have to learn to deal with dynamic
unpredictable things and relationships and I have to learn how to deal with them and myself
for how I am. Doesn't mean I don't struggle for a goal but in terms of what arfie noticed once
about my writing is that there is no 'perfect way of life.'
malibumark
malibumark

I also am remembering that I need to be self responsible - it's an important idea to remember but
it can be tough.