angry numb.

I am at the point if someone tries to piss me off I will scream at them when I know most of my anger should be at my husband for leaving me. I woke up this afternoon and I could not put pressure on my left leg it turns some how I tore the leg muscle. I truely miss my husband it hurts somedays but mostly when I am sitting alone in our room is when I remember him the most. Tomorrow, I am going to recycle his cell phone and our older cells as well. I just wonder how the rest of my life is going to be.