All is well that ends well
haha ok, time for another Journal entry, and its a very positive one :D
I've gotten a job proposition that is really awesome, I just need to basically speak to the people about relocating and such, which makes me very nervous, cause I dont want them to think I'm pushing my luck and find another candidate.
But I at least know now that I got what it takes :D and even if after I've pushed my luck they pull back their offer I know that God will open another door, and that I WILL be alright, this experience has been a wonderful test of strength and hope, and has opened up my eyes a lot in the way of support and how I do deserve someone that I can open up to that wont get chased away from my problems, its been really amazing and affirming for me, and even if those around me fall away I know that God will ALWAYS bring more people in my life to help me open up and lean on in a way.
I'm so grateful to those from this site that has helped me though my deep depression, and it has really turned it around and made it better! (you know who you are)
Its kind of opened my eyes as to what my depression might have sourced from, the fact that I had no-one in my life that I could totally open up to and feeling like I needed to take the weight of the world on my own shoulders, and it really helped me to realize and REMEMBER that I can shift that weight onto someone else's much stronger shoulders, Gods..
I realized its not actually my weight to bear, and it never was, it was always his, and he couldn't stand seeing me carry it alone any longer, such an amazing God that exists in a very real way in my life, and the fact that I could NEVER fall away from his grace.. (another source of my depression)
I realized and remembered that those thoughts of being alone, and taking the responsibility and guilt of not being able to help those around me were as always just the voices of the enemy and not actual the truth, thankfully the truth always shines though the light!
I really hope those that read this entry see how I've dealt with my depression and are able to get some kind of strength from it, and some courage from it to make it though the day knowing that anything is possible when you have God on your side and a supporting hand to help pick you up when you down..
I've gotten a job proposition that is really awesome, I just need to basically speak to the people about relocating and such, which makes me very nervous, cause I dont want them to think I'm pushing my luck and find another candidate.
But I at least know now that I got what it takes :D and even if after I've pushed my luck they pull back their offer I know that God will open another door, and that I WILL be alright, this experience has been a wonderful test of strength and hope, and has opened up my eyes a lot in the way of support and how I do deserve someone that I can open up to that wont get chased away from my problems, its been really amazing and affirming for me, and even if those around me fall away I know that God will ALWAYS bring more people in my life to help me open up and lean on in a way.
I'm so grateful to those from this site that has helped me though my deep depression, and it has really turned it around and made it better! (you know who you are)
Its kind of opened my eyes as to what my depression might have sourced from, the fact that I had no-one in my life that I could totally open up to and feeling like I needed to take the weight of the world on my own shoulders, and it really helped me to realize and REMEMBER that I can shift that weight onto someone else's much stronger shoulders, Gods..
I realized its not actually my weight to bear, and it never was, it was always his, and he couldn't stand seeing me carry it alone any longer, such an amazing God that exists in a very real way in my life, and the fact that I could NEVER fall away from his grace.. (another source of my depression)
I realized and remembered that those thoughts of being alone, and taking the responsibility and guilt of not being able to help those around me were as always just the voices of the enemy and not actual the truth, thankfully the truth always shines though the light!
I really hope those that read this entry see how I've dealt with my depression and are able to get some kind of strength from it, and some courage from it to make it though the day knowing that anything is possible when you have God on your side and a supporting hand to help pick you up when you down..
Replies
It makes me so happy to read this and know that you\'re doing well. I think that your faith in God is going to continue to get you through whatever struggles come your way. It seems that this whole experience in the end was to bring you closer to his loving presence, and help you realize you don\'t have to bear these burdens alone. And you\'re right the truth always shines through the light, I love that!
haha it just occurred to me that this title makes it seem like I\'m not going to keep coming to this site, on the contrary, I\'m not going anywhere, I might be doing well, and dealt with my depression, but its about keeping at it even when you feel strong, keeping yourself in check almost, not giving the chance to feel down if that makes any sense..