a reason 2 cry

either i have to accept that the right man 4 me wanted someone else & maybe still wants someone else or that i am married 2 the wrong man.  how can someone who wld do this 2 me be the right man 4 me?  have an affair 4 2 years....4 2 years my marriage was a joke and a lie!  i can accept that the right man 4 me is imperfect.  i accepted that a long time ago, but i feel this is 2 much & therefore i am paralized.  because the woman i thought that i was...that i wish 2 b wld never allow this.  wld never stay married 2 someone who wld do this.....and yet here i am with no plan or expectation of leaving.  so who am i?