A Personal Choice
I'm just back from shopping and realized something: It's a choice that I've made to remain single. I don't have to do it.
This ephiphany came while shopping, noticing all the couples around me. I'm used to seeing them now, but this time I really took notice. Some seemed happy while others seemed oblivious to each other, talking on the telephone, or picking up items from the shelves. Some people were alone like me--some attractive, some just plain folk. Then there's me paying attention for the first time. I noticed men looking at me. I've lost some weight so I guess I'll have to get used to it. But the thing that struck me is that I've decided not to marry again. I've decided this for my own comfort, yet I was obviously envious of all the couples.
So, maybe I need to consider that I just don't want to bother looking for a life partner. I admitt to hating the idea of getting to know a person. I hate the inevitable religious conversation that must come up. I hate the thought of the guy walking away once he discovers my devotion to God. Living as a Christian just doesn't fit into the 21st century when it comes to relationships. I guess it's just easier to remain alone.
Yet, the decision I'm making now will be what I'll live with in my future. So, tonight, I'll take myself into that future. I'll picture myself there, 74 years old, and alone, and I'll see how I like it. Then I'll do something about it or do nothing at all.
This ephiphany came while shopping, noticing all the couples around me. I'm used to seeing them now, but this time I really took notice. Some seemed happy while others seemed oblivious to each other, talking on the telephone, or picking up items from the shelves. Some people were alone like me--some attractive, some just plain folk. Then there's me paying attention for the first time. I noticed men looking at me. I've lost some weight so I guess I'll have to get used to it. But the thing that struck me is that I've decided not to marry again. I've decided this for my own comfort, yet I was obviously envious of all the couples.
So, maybe I need to consider that I just don't want to bother looking for a life partner. I admitt to hating the idea of getting to know a person. I hate the inevitable religious conversation that must come up. I hate the thought of the guy walking away once he discovers my devotion to God. Living as a Christian just doesn't fit into the 21st century when it comes to relationships. I guess it's just easier to remain alone.
Yet, the decision I'm making now will be what I'll live with in my future. So, tonight, I'll take myself into that future. I'll picture myself there, 74 years old, and alone, and I'll see how I like it. Then I'll do something about it or do nothing at all.
Replies
I have always thought I would remain single, and still might. I\'ve had the conversation about religion already, and how I believe that sex happens after marriage, and it\'s a moral issue with a relationship. I think if you find the right person, (in the future) that believes the same way, it could happen. Maybe I\'m being too naive. I guess you should never say never. We still have a good 20 years left. I don\'t really want to be alone that long.
Paula
I watch couples constantly when I go out. Initially I couldn`t even look at them without crying and leaving the store. Now I really watch them and many don`t seem to have the kind of happiness and comfort level we had with our spouses. Just wish we could turn back the clock. Thinking of you and thanks for being there for me since I joined DS, Lu Ann
Good for you! Realizing it\'s your choice. Not to long ago I was surprised to actually notice a man was attractive...other then just admiring God\'s work...I was single for some time before marrying Mike...never good at telling if someone was atracted to me so no idea on the 2nd time around...it\'s scary to even think about it so I leave it to the Lord...His will be done in your life sweet lady...21st century of not God is still God and can do what He wishes..Just stay open. Hugs, D
Tru,
I\'m not making any decisions about a relationship.
I don\'t really want to be alone for the rest of my
life, but, I have discovered that I enjoy being alone most of the time. Then, there are times that I would love to have someone to talk to, have his arm around me, hold his hand. As far as the subject of knowing God, well, I don\'t want anyone that doesn\'t know Jesus as his personal Savior.
I assume that if the Lord wants me to meet someone, He will make it happen. I don\'t believe in coincidences, when someone meets, I believe there is Divine Intervention - IF they are meant to be together. So, I\'m leaving it up to HIM. I can decide if/when the time comes how I feel. As far as sex, that\'s after marriage. The man would have to believe that too.
Hugs, Joely
You are the only one who knows what is right for you. If being alone the rest of your life is what is right for you, all the best. It is not for me that is for sure. From Diane B.
I agree with Joely and Diane...what works for you and if there is someone out there for you and it was meant to be to will happen...Hugs, Ellen
Tru,
I am also a strong Christian, and I don\'t know what God has in store for me. I do pray that I will continue to walk closely with HIm. Being single, offers so many temptations that we didn\'t have to face when so Happily married.
I pray whatever God has in store for me... be it a purpose and a ministry.... great. If He has a man for me, I would also be happy. I know God has a plan and a purpose for each of HIs children.
So glad to know you and be your friend... my Sister in the Lord.
Linda
That may well be the right decision for now. It may or may not be the right decision for you in the future. 20 years is a long time. Perhaps you should just take that healthy attitude and leave your options open. Your destiny will play itself out no matter what you decide today. Big Hugs.