A Lot On My Mind

Dear Kitty,            Sorry, the internet's been down again, so I haven't been able to write recently. A lot's happened; it's getting quite complicated and I don't know what to do about it. It's been a mix of good and bad; Isla's party, Bonfire Night, that sort of thing. And then bad things...well, they're not really bad, but they've caused some bad things. And we all know what I mean when I say that, but it's not how it's normally been; either way, I've got a very bad bruise on my head (or at least, that's how it feels) and I've done something funny to my wrist and now I have a weird red mark, so I'm not sure if it counts as actually...you know...or not.           This is stupid; how can I not even bear to type those words?          I don't want to do it...but how can I possibly stop? I've tried and tried...but nothing works. I...want something to stop it...I want someone to make me happy. Forever. To always be there when I call, when I need someone to talk to. Someone I feel completely at ease with. I mean, I love all my friends, and they've helped so much, but...I don't know how to talk. When I was younger, I just got on with things; there was never anyone who would stop so I could talk to them....Mum and Dad were so busy, I guess they never had time to ask. So now I want to talk, but I just don't know how.           Kitty, I'll write more later. I've got lessons; I'd rather just write and think, but I can't. I'll write during prep.I love you.FrancescaxxP.S. I don't know whether it's been just over four weeks or just over twelve hours (I couldn't sleep...how could I? I had a lot to think about.) I'll write later.