Things suck.I have just learned to come to the terms that I won't ever be able to believe what a guy says to me. This past couple weeks there's been...actually I don't even want to remember, all the times I have gotten screwed over. And not like stupid petty things.I really don't want to do this anymore. I don't want to get up out of bed and live a normal life because I'm terrified. I can't sleep anymore. My mind is racing constantely. I feel bad because I'm so out of it most of the time that I lose myself in my thoughts when I'm around other people. If I could just shove them away it would help, but it's not happening.Although, I am proud of myself for the fact that I did not self-injure, or go to any other form of self-harm. Instead I stayed in bed and got my big teddy bear and cried and cried.There's no such thing as love.