depression

Since reaching my 350 weight goal,  I haven't lost another ounce. I know I haven't been doing things the way I'm supposed to. I've been depressed and that takes away my energy to do things. My twin granddaughters have been my joy but my daughter is going to move to another state. I know it will be good for her and the girls but it sucks for me. I miss them so much already and they're not even gone yet. My son is back in jail again and has to come live with me because he doesn't have anywhere else to go. When my kids had become older teens I stopped being afraid of things like snakes and such because I realized that most of my greatest fears had been realized and there just wasn't anything left to be afraid of. Now I realize that I fear 3 things: my daughter moving my granddaughters away, my son going to prison, and me dying before ever getting to a normal weight. The first is coming true and now I'm starting to think that whatever I fear will come true. I don't want to see my son in prison and I don't want to die without experiencing life at a somewhat normal weight, but I'm afraid that's what's happening. I don't want to be without my grandbabies and there's nothing I can do about it. They gave me joy and inspiration for losing weight and getting through the hard times. I don't know what I'll do without them.