I am so frustrated with myself. I did well with my eating all through the day, then I had to take my son a cell phone because he broke his and he needs one for work and to keep in touch with his PO. Actually, I bought me a really cool cell phone and gave him my old one. I didn't think I should reward him for being careless with his. (not that I haven't done the same thing, but no one gave me a new one when I did) Anyway, I'm digressing. When I went to take him his cell. He asked me to take him to Burger King. I obliged and thought that I would get a "little something" for myself. For some reason at the drive thru speaker I ordered a double whopper. Even as I was doing it the voices in my mind were fighting. You know-"What are you doing? You can't eat that" then "oh it won't hurt". It was a huge burger. Even as I was eating it I was wrestling with my conscience. I totally knew better. I was not hungry, but I totally ignored all reason and ate that entire thing. I wish I could step out of my body and slap myself. What's worse is that my son has a drug problem (which I suspect is turning into an alcohol problem). I get on his case and tell him he needs to straighten up and get his life together, make good choices, etc.- and there I am-modeling addictive behavior right in front of him. I really need to have my butt kicked good. I do need to give myself credit for the positives though. I did come home and work on the treadmill. I did eat sensibly up until the burger. Next week I meet with the bariatric surgeon and I wanted to have my whole 40 lbs lost. I have 10 more to go. If I get with it I could lose it by then. I've done it before. Another positive is that I've lost down to nearly where I was before I went off my eating plan. Tomorrow is another day. Tomorrow I will get it right. I can't expect perfection, but I do need to step it up and do better. It's just so frustrating.

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

I\'m right there with you...it is soo frustrating...I don\'t want this to be a ra ra you can do it thing, but you can and will do it, you have done an awesome job already by only have 10 more lb to go to lose your 40 lbs, and i know it seems to be the same old \"tomorrow is another day blah blah blah\", but it is the truth and yes we all have slip ups and wonder afterwards, why on earth did i eat that, but as you say none of us are perfect, just get back on track today... and you will win the battle....
deleted_user
deleted_user

Why do we do these things?????? It is not a matter of hungry vs nonhungry...for me it is addiction. Proud of you for getting on the treadmill and glad you\'ve almost lost the weight you gained. It is great you have a goal to meet and sound motivated before you meet with your bariatric surgeon. Hang in there!!!!

Hugs, Truth