I'm really having a bad day today. I had a big fight with my son. My heart is just being ripped out by this kid. I don't know what to do. I don't even think I know him any more. He thinks I make him out to be a monster, but I don't think I do. I tell him I know he is bright and has tons of potential and I can't stand to see him throw it away. now this stupid computer is not letting me journal right. I had written a whole page and it just erased it so I had to start over. I am just so tired of crying and worrying over this kid. I was doing good at letting go until he moved back in. This is the deepest kind of pain. gut wrenching, down to your soul pain. I promised myself I wasn't going to cry over this kid any more, but here I am.The up side is that I have been doing very good with my eating and exercising. I did 100 steps on the treadmil today and I might do some more now to get the grief out. I ate a big breakfast but noo lunch because of my schedule. Its too close to dinner now. Gotta go pick up my grand babies. Thank you all for your support.
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Congrats on how well you\'re doing with your eating and exercising. I know every family is different, but want to share that when my son was going through so many problems, what helped some was to ride out the moment when he was cussing, yelling, knocking over furniture or whatever. Later, sometimes a couple hours or sometimes the next day when he...really when we...were both kind of drained and calmer, we\'d talk through what had happened, why we\'re upset, all the things that we just couldn\'t/wouldn\'t hear earlier. It took several years, just getting through each day, riding through all the tough stuff and coming back to these \'debriefing\' sessions...very painful and often thinking it would never get better. But it did, honest.
Hang in there sugar. We are there for you.
I\'m just back from my surgery (6days) and am trying to catch up on my messages. Just want to send you my prayers for all you\'re going through. Keep the faith and don\'t give up. I do believe better days are ahead for you and your son.
I\'m doing well so far...more soon!
Hugs,
Becky