Wow, I can't believe it's been 8 months since I've been on!  Summer is a busy season for me, Thank God, The busier I am, the less time I have to think.  Sometimes thinkings not good.  My Dr. upped my Zoloft to 200mg a day, and it seems to be working pretty good.  I still have very dark days, but not as often as before, I still miss PJ more than I can stand, and it still kills me to think that he had to take his own life, but I think I'm beginning to come to terms with this.  I sometimes think of the things he'd done and it'll bring a chuckle, he did some doosey's, he was such a goof, and I miss him so much.  But I guess it's true, life does go on.  We had a memeorial service for my best friend Bruce, who passed away in Jan.  His family did absolutly nothing for him, it's so sad.  We planted a sruce tree(Icalled him Spruce, because he was so tall), and placed a plaque at his site, at his favorite place.  It was sort of closure for alot of us who were his friends and family.  Still miss him too.  But I do think I'm making slow progress, but I have to say it's been the crappiest time of my life.  PJ, I miss you so much, if only I could see and talk to you one more time, maybe things would be different.