Jeez, I just saw that it was7 months ago that I've written anything. Things are going as expected i guess, some good days here and there, but mostly just lost days, I just don't seem to be able to get back to what was a normal life. I don't care about much of anything anymore, just go along with what everyone else wants to do, and not with much enthusiasm. I don't think there's a day that goes by, without thinking of PJ, or talking to him, it's almost like an obsession, but people think I'm ok! And I'm thinking to myself, can't you people see I'm not right, so I guess I'm doing a good job at hiding what's inside me. My dr. keeps giving me more pills for things he finds wrong, and I just keep taking them, I don't know how I got all this stuff wrong with me, I was fine before PJ took his life, now I'm falling apart, go figure!! Oh well, guess the dr. knows best. So that's about what's happening in my life, not much, which is fine by me. Quiet, uneventful, that's how I like it.
Replies
So nice to hear from you...you know it is okay to question what the doctor gives you...maybe YOU don\'t need everything he thinks you need...I hope that you have a peaceful holiday season...love and hugs...Karen
Hello again. I am so sorry you are having such a hard time. I think we have probably all done what you are doing. I have kept alot inside in the past and still do at times. My daughter\'s \"angel date\" is coming up, it will be four years. This is my fourth Christmas without her and I really didn\'t care one way or the other if I did anything. This year I have done a bit better. I also like quiet and uneventful. But I was like that before. Just please know that my heart aches for you and you are in my prayers. Everyone here on DS is so awesome. I don\'t know what I would have done if I hadn\'t had DS and my friends to help me through my nightmare. Much love to you and hugs. We are all here for you.
Carol
We do keep it inside for the most part, but the beauty of FMO is that you can share here and we understand. Before my son died, I remember a mother that I knew who had lost her child came to the vet that I was working for. I asked her how she was doing and she told me that while she looked fine on the outside, no one knew what was going on in the inside. I didn\'t have a clue then what she meant, but I do now. I wish I was still in contact with her so that she could join us and find support. Hugs, Belinda