So now we come to the bottom line.Can I get over the fact she is with this guy, immidietely after our seperation, or is it something I just wont be able to get over?  Im not talking about forgiveness, as I wont be capable of that for a while. But just being able to say "ok im the bigger man here, im not going to let it anger me anymore".   So we can be decent to each other.   It all comes down to that.   So I have some hard thinking to do.   She said I can call her if I decide I can get over her having this guy in her life; that we can go forward as friends.   Or I can decide im not going to accept it or get over it, and we only talk when it involves the kids.