i was woken up this morning being told that i have to get my butt outside to help with the yard work (raking up leaves and putting them in a wheelbarrow and moving them to woods in the back)....my mom was like "melissa u r a member of this family too so get ur butt outside"....funny how im a member of the family when they want something from me huh? any other time, i am someone who can be ignored....haha what a fucking joke this ismy parents went grocery shopping without me...as always...and now they are buying me even less than b4...my ED interprets this as..."well they buy u less so therefore just eat less".......god i am so stubborn when it comes to my ED..........im too skinny....im too tired to care though....fuck it...fuck me...fuck ED....fuck this everyday possibley life long battle....who coined the term u can never be too rich or too thin?....cuz id like to speak to them....maybe im about to come into loads of money?
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I believe \"you can never be too rich or too thin\" was first coined by the Duchess of Windsor. She\'s dead now so there\'s no point in speaking to her, ha! I wish she were alive to see the cultural damage that she created with those words. There\'s two words that are the most scary for an anorexic: \"fuck it\" I know it sucks but I hope you someday realize how worth it is to fight the lifelong battle. Hugs and Kisses. XOXOXO
Gab, that was my mother\'s favourite fucking quote, and I wanted to strangle her for it. When she saw how thin I had gotten last year, I said snidely: \"So, CAN you be too rich or too thin?\" And she just stared at me blankly and said: \"Yes. Yes, you are too thin.\"
Missy, it sounds like you really need to get away from the triggering influences of your parents. They are huge triggers to your ED, and you resent them for that. My parents were the same way. The last several years, I used my ED to \"get back at them\" but really I was just hurting myself. Now that I\'ve come to terms with my past and my resent for how my parents treated me in my childhood, I\'m able to see that all my starving and all my bingeing and all my purging is not going to kill my parents, it will just kill me.
So, my advice: save up your money, find a roommate and get outta that house! Tell your parents you need little contact with them for the time being so that you can get help for your ED. Don\'t act angry or irritated, just concerned for your well-being. Place boundaries for yourself. You\'re going to have to struggle, but you have struggled long enough anyway under your parents\' roof. Do it for you.
So I was thinking you need to get out of your parents house and I need to get the hell out of my parents house??????? Maybe we should just move away together. Think about it, we could so aford it. It\'s not like either of us spend money on food so we could get a nice place together. We\'d just have to find someplace where the heating bill is included in the rent fee because that bill would be out the ass....lol.......rent is fairly cheep here....can get a 3 bedroom for about $750 a month or just rent a house for less then that but then you have to pay all the bills for the house uggggg.
I think being around your parents isn\'t good... Maybe going away to treatment is the answer and then you can figure a plan while you are there, get healthy, and get the fuck out... They are the root of a lot of your problems, I think. I love you! :)
Okay, so seriously, who\'s with me on the money pool for Missy\'s cause? (God, I would if I weren\'t in the red myself.)