116.......la di da........116........and im 72.5 inches...bwhahaha..........mixed feelings about this weight........part of me is saying ah faboodle fudge!! ur losing again...bad girl....and the other part of me is happy cuz my body isnt gaining...so i know im not becoming obese.......grrrrrr....im so conflicted...not just at this moment...it just seems like i am conflicted ALL OF THE TIMEwas supposed to be going on a double date tonight to the movies...feel bad cuz i havent seen my bf in like 2 wks...ED doesnt mind...cuz spending time with james might conflict with my eating routine....and well apparently james's nephew had to go to the emergency room so james is watching his niece and might not be able to make it to the movie....i hate not knowing what im gonna be doing....movie? bingo? guess the only thing im sure of anymore is my ED...im not sure about school, my living arrangements...my parents....my life...but ED...that is a constant in my life
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Hey I hope you have a good night! I know I am the say way went I am not knowing what I am going to be doing...I like routine!! Have a good one!
I know what a life of conflict feels like...Hope you\'re able to find a clear pathway to want you want:)
I know how you feel. When I step on the scale (which I have no business doing but that\'s besides your point) I have this devil/angel thing going on. ED is always something to turn to. The one that is there for us when we\'re lonely or bored or scared. If he didn\'t ruin our lives and try to see us dead, he wouldn\'t be so bad. XOXO
Maybe its is becoming more and more certain that it remains in ur life because nothing else is! Thats how it seems 4 me wen everything in life is a question!
familiar is good for us and ed is familar. i know when i step on the scale it is a battle of the feelings. if the weight is down i feel guilty like i am failing my family but i feel great at the same time like i accomplished something. the mind battles suck. i know where you are coming from. i hope it gets better for you.
total coping mechanisim - know how you feel. its the familiarity amongst the chaos - the only constant and thats a comforting thought
who wouldnt be comforted by an established coping mechanisim amongst everything thats going on and has gone on in your life lately.
dont know how to suggest to find a new one but the first step is knowing (which i know you alrady do) and from there you can go places. oohhh i hope james\'s nephew is ok. emergency rooms are never a good thing. hope everything works out ok and he gets back in time for your double date
lots of love
ninny
xxx
i know the feeling of wanting that constant...but how about a constant weight!?i like that idea :]
babaes,yuu are totally stronge and yuu can beat this...i know in thousands of ways,115 is a scary number...but yuu know the truth.its to low.and yuu need to stop it.