well i didnt go to the fair as planned today....my friend who i havent seen for 2 yrs said that it was too hot out and that he wanted me to come to his house swimming....so i grabbed my little bikini and went to his house swimming...i know alot of people on this site have a problem with swim suits...but i know that i am skinny and that i look good in one...so i dont stress about it.....him and i decided to go to the fair tomorrow....so yea...that was the fun part of my day...the beginning part was spent getting my lexapro filled and then trying to find out wtf happened with my loan application for college!!!! called the school and they had no idea...said i have to apply again!! AHHH...screw this online loan crap...im going to the school and getting the paper copies! and then me and MR pencil are gonna get me some loan money! and my mom said she's help me......bless her heart!!! i love that womanso charlie and i went to bingo with my mom and grandma....lol i love bingo...im a nerd like that....and i mentioned how hot it was out and how i had to crawl into bed with my sister last night cuz her room has AC and mine doesnt...and my mom was like y dont u ask dad to put urs in for u? and i said i dont like to ask him for things.....and then proceeded to ask my mom if she would help me put it in.....she said just ask dad! he will do it for u! he knows how to do it right.........i said i dont wanna ask him for ne thing.........so she called him and left a message for him to put in my AC.....and when i got home it was in........i kind of would have rather wrestled wiht it myself then have my father do it for me.......he treats me like shit....so i dont feel as though he thinks that i am worth helping out..........food side of things......i fucked up...AGAIN.......i didnt eat for 19 hrs.......crap........im anorexic not stupid so i ate a little something...i never go 24 hrs wihtout something.....im just mad at myself for not taking it upon myself to not go for 19 hrs......missy missy missy u r never gonna get better if u keep not eating for long periods at a time...........grrrrr....is there a non food related way to recover from anorexia? lol didnt think so
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I\'m so envious of you that you can see your body the way it is. I think if I weighed 2oz. I would still look in the mirror and see a fat person. That is really awesome. And don\'t beat yourself up for going so long without eating (certainly I am not condoning the behavior) but recovery is not a perfect line. There are set backs. I wish your dad wasn\'t so intimidating. Sounds like you got a good mom to support you, that\'s great. Good luck with college, I feel your paperwork pain. :)
It is bloody hot outside...
Did you Dad even say anything about the AC? Maybe a, hey is the AC working in your room? Or does he just ignore you completly? Anyways... That was some sarcasim, and me being rude upon him..
I can\'t go more than 10 hours. I just about puked again today because my body needed food. It\'s not healthy, but I don\'t even know what to say to that. Try better next time? lol... You should really eat, even if it\'s half, a protein bar or something. I do that. I just pop in half if it\'s been more than 5 hours. I try anyways... I didn\'t today and look what happened.
Neil is having the same trouble with his loan papers too! haha... I can\'t believe school is just around the corner. I\'m so glad. I miss it.
I remember all the college loan crap..it does really suck. You\'ll get better with your eating. Just eat more today if you can. Hope you have fun today!
ekkk.this school loan thing sounds like a ton of trouble!!
i\'m gald that yuu can see yurself has skinny.and its good to hear that sum of us crazyss dont have bathingsuit issuses.=]
even if you just eat something little, it\'s better than not eating at all for 19 hours...i know how hard it is though, i was where you are at one point in my past...
and thank you for the complement about my pictures..you are beautiful yourself though, don\'t forget!
Glad you have a good supportive Mom. My house is a big dysfunctional mess right now. We had a family meeting last night which went pretty well though.
The swimsuit, how we see ourselves, how we think other people see us, I\'m just glad you know you\'re skinny. I know I\'m skinny but that swimsuit thing is harder for me. I feel like people either think I\'m a cancer patient or a 44 year old crack whore. Good luck with Dad and the application! XOXOXOXOXO
have you ever thought about drinking your calories instead? get boost or ensure (they now come in handy travel bottles!) and take them with you when you leave or have them at home. it\'s sometimes easier for people to drink their calories....just a suggestion.