ok so i couldnt get the pulse thing off my mind while i was laying in bed last night...so i took it myself...and it was 62! phew thank god! the girl is gonna live doctor!so i am cold ALL of the time....today at work this woman and her two children came up and got ice cream....and while they were waiting for me to get it for them i heard the little boy ask his mom ...is it cold in there?...and then when i came over with the ice cream he asked me if it was cold inside the building.....there i am in a hoodie and jeans while the rest of my co workers were in shorts and t shirts...so i said no its not cold in here.....cuz obviously...no one else was cold...so therefore it must not have been cold...it was only chilly for me....i hate this being cold all of the time....i know its a part of ED and this is yet another good motivation to get better....i have only been swimming twice this summer! and i used to live in the pool during the summertime!i have therapy tomorrow.....and college orientation on wednesday....im worried about the orientation....i dont know where to go and waht time to be there! i feel like im the only one out of the loop!!!! eek!!!!i am so tired of thinking about my ED! everyday its on my mind....not a day goes by that i dont think about it......so i often wonder....if i didnt have my ED what would i think about all day long? do i hold on so strongly to my disorder because i am so familiar with it and it has become my companion? i guess the fear of the unknown...or unremembered....(life without ED).....is a scary thing to me..... ok so while driving today.....i was totally lost in thought again....and i wondered....if i were to get amnesia, would i totally forget about my ED? or is it so ingrained that even amnesia couldnt wipe it out?.......well if amnesia could take ED away....then i need to start having people whack me about the head! lol any takers?
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yeah sometimes i feel kind of bad when i go to my sisters for the biggest reason to get out of my house where i can binge..
i often wonder and try and remember what i thought about before i suffered from ED..but i have no idea. it\'s boggling.
and i know how you feel about being cold. well, i dont anymore really..but when i was losing weight it was early spring so it was when people were beginning to just wear tshirts and stuff. and i was shivering in class with a sweatshirt on! man, i def. do not miss those days..i know you dont want to hear that, haha, but just keep in your mind that eventually you will be warm again!
The chills are definitely part of the eating disorder, but they may also be do to bad circulation. I know that I get them when I am not eating healthy and exercising. just a thought.
You will be fine at college orientation. Call the school to find out the specifics and don\'t worry. Everyone is nervous at college orientation. You will be great.
I agree with you that we sometimes hold onto our eating disorder, especially if we have had it for a long time. But, we just need to keep fighting those thoughts. Realize that we are better than eating disorders.
Have a great day!
I know what you mean...I spend a great deal of my day thinking about what to eat and not eat, how much to exercise, fighting binges. Good luck with orientation today! Hugs!
I know what you mean...I spend a great deal of my day thinking about what to eat and not eat, how much to exercise, fighting binges. Good luck with orientation today! Hugs!
Just reminded me how all last winter I wore my down jacket in the house when it wasn\'t cold. Interesting to see if I\'m cold this winter after I\'ve gained so much weight.
That\'s so weird, but I was hit in the back of the head with a golf club yesterday and I had the same thought, like maybe it knocked some sense into me? Nope. I\'m still obsessing over breakfast.. XOXOXOXOXO
i know how u feel abt orientation, i hate going places im unfamiliar with but if someone i know is going ill usually try and arrange to meet them before walking in...is there anyone u can go with?
and i also wonder abt what i would think abt if i didnt have an ed, while i try to remember that it doesnt define me it is still hard to think abt life without it because its become so much a part of every day life...but we have to remember that we deserve better and we can get better!