well i have finally gotten out of bed...i woke up at like 12:30 and layed in bed reading til 1:45....now i feel lazy and i hate the feeling of being lazy....cuz i feel that being lazy means i do not get the ok to eat...wow this is messed up....u know what else is messed up? i have never been diagnosed with ocd...but i was thinking about this last night...and i thought of all of the things that i do that might be ocd behaviors....
1) wash dishes that havent been run through the dishwasher before using them...and only wiht a paper towel and soap since the dish cloth may have food residue in it(aka calories)
2) constantly use antibacterial hand sanitizer for fear that there may be food residue on my hands (aka calories)
3) when i turn off the oven and go to walk away i always have to go back and check it again...turn my head look....turn my head look....turn my head look...turn my head look (4 is my number)
4) i eat things methodically and usually everything is done in 4 bites or in 8 depending on its size (for instance a sandwich would be done like this...pull crust off of the outside all the way around and eat that first...then separate the rest into 4 pieces...then eat eat piece in 4 bites)
5) as soon as people in my house are done reading the newspaper...it MUST be put into the recycling bin and cannot be layed on the floor (my rule not theirs...although no one is aware that i have this rule)
6) there can be NO garbage in the downstairs bathroom garbage can...again my rule and no one elses...when i see garbage in there i empty it out into the big kitchem garbage can
7) before going to bed i MUST check the washer and dryer...and the lint trap to make sure everything is empty
8)when i touch something with my right hand i must touch it with my left hand the same amount of times so taht everything is equal
9) when walking on a sidewalk i take 2 or 4 steps in each square (depending on the size of the sidewalk) and i do not step on the cracks...although i have been working on this one and i haven't been doing it all of the time YAHH ME!
10) i count all steps taht i walk up and down...3 steps up then a landing then 11 more to the upstairs of my house...i do this every time and miraculously the numbers never change lol
11) after i flush the toilet and walk away...if i even think about the act of flushing a toilet i MUST go back and check to make sure i did even if i remember hearing it flush...turn my head look...turn my head look (until this is done 4 times)
im sure there are more but i shall not incriminate myself any further...it is a miracle that no one notices all of these acts except for me....sometimes i question my sanity...thanks to anyone who reads this and decides to keep talking to me!
1) wash dishes that havent been run through the dishwasher before using them...and only wiht a paper towel and soap since the dish cloth may have food residue in it(aka calories)
2) constantly use antibacterial hand sanitizer for fear that there may be food residue on my hands (aka calories)
3) when i turn off the oven and go to walk away i always have to go back and check it again...turn my head look....turn my head look....turn my head look...turn my head look (4 is my number)
4) i eat things methodically and usually everything is done in 4 bites or in 8 depending on its size (for instance a sandwich would be done like this...pull crust off of the outside all the way around and eat that first...then separate the rest into 4 pieces...then eat eat piece in 4 bites)
5) as soon as people in my house are done reading the newspaper...it MUST be put into the recycling bin and cannot be layed on the floor (my rule not theirs...although no one is aware that i have this rule)
6) there can be NO garbage in the downstairs bathroom garbage can...again my rule and no one elses...when i see garbage in there i empty it out into the big kitchem garbage can
7) before going to bed i MUST check the washer and dryer...and the lint trap to make sure everything is empty
8)when i touch something with my right hand i must touch it with my left hand the same amount of times so taht everything is equal
9) when walking on a sidewalk i take 2 or 4 steps in each square (depending on the size of the sidewalk) and i do not step on the cracks...although i have been working on this one and i haven't been doing it all of the time YAHH ME!
10) i count all steps taht i walk up and down...3 steps up then a landing then 11 more to the upstairs of my house...i do this every time and miraculously the numbers never change lol
11) after i flush the toilet and walk away...if i even think about the act of flushing a toilet i MUST go back and check to make sure i did even if i remember hearing it flush...turn my head look...turn my head look (until this is done 4 times)
im sure there are more but i shall not incriminate myself any further...it is a miracle that no one notices all of these acts except for me....sometimes i question my sanity...thanks to anyone who reads this and decides to keep talking to me!
Replies
haha this made me laugh a little, and i know it isn\'t really funny, but i laughed because i\'m like that too! for instance when i set my alarm on my clock or my phone, i have to check it 3 times to make sure it is set right. All my drawers have to be shut before I go to bed, and I eat my sandwiches just like you. I could keep going. haha. I guess everyone has a little OCD but to be honest i kind of think the whole ED thing is completely OCD. having to exercise, count calories, etc etc. it\'s crazyy
I can completely relate to most things on your list! the stove, the counting steps, i even have to take turns what side i chew on so it\'s even. OCD can really interfere with every day living, mine is definitely getting better (I don\'t get out of bed to check for the 4th time that the dront door is locked anymore!) If you do find that some or all of your compulsions are getting in the way, maybe try and do something about it (dunno if you have a therapist or not, but maybe speak to someone), or if you decide to try and stop them on your own don\'t try more than one or 2 things at a time or you\'ll get overwhelmed!
But hey you\'re not alone, I think everyone gets like that at least some of the time. And there are definitely studies about the correlation between EDs and OCD.
yes, ive been told that ED are co-morbid with OCD ....and weaknessinme i do have a therapist...but her and i are trying to work on the eating stuff at the moment so i have kind of put the working on the ocd on the back burner for now