today sucks..my so called new bf craig seems to think that i need to call him everyday...im sorry but i am not needy like this and i dont want a guy who is needy either....we got into a screaming match yet again about phone calls or lack there of...it's not like he calls...well he does but the idiot doesnt leave messages on the answering machine...dumbass.....he wants to hang out tonight but all i really wanna do is go to bingo like i try to every saturday...this is a relxing thing that i can rely on kind of like the safe foods thing...im terrified of tomororw....easter always entails a huge dinner....and i know the lack of the amount that i consume is gonna be a huge tension point...all of the school stress and boy stress in my life is taking its toll on my eating...im now under 700 calories a day...and that is even dwindling....imagine if i had a job at the moment? god i feel like such a loser...how does everyone else handle this thing called life????? why do i have to rely on an ED????? matt wont take a hint and keeps calling me....DUDE IM NOT ANSWERING DUH!!!!.....i am in the worst state right now....craig wants to go out tonight and if i tell him i wanna go to bingo he's gonna have a hissy fit...well if he doesnt call me before bingo time rolls around then im goin to bingo and to hell with him!
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Most men are dumbasses, they just dont seem to get it. Um, I tend to deal with life through ED to. Living on my own I have only myself to answer to, so ED tends to run ramped more often then I would like him to. I think we rely on him a lot bc it is a coping skill, granted a very negative one, and only ends up causing more stress in the end. But it is familiar, and comforting for a time. I find putting things in its place works best for me, bc I am lost without it. Bingo is a great way to destress if that is something you enjoy. And yes, to hell with him if he can\'t understand that! Its your life. PS pardon my rambling... I tend to do that. ~Amy