Catch up
Hello my special friends,
I thought I would connect since I seem to have been off the radar for a while. The months are flying by...can you believe we are nearly into May!
I see my last journal entry was me expressing pain over the prospect of no grandchildren - well I am very excited to tell you all that my daughter is pregnant! it's very early days so she is not telling friends yet, but I am! mainly for prayers please that all goes well. She has such a stressful job and is feeling tired, nauseas and blue. Her husband travels a lot and is in Spain at the moment, which doesn't help. This is my younger daughter Jayne who has the polysystic ovarian syndrome. She has been going the natural route and been balancing her hormones as opposed to having meds to help with ovulation. God is good!! Please also pray that my older daughter, Simone, falls pregnant soon -she wants to but doesn't want to be 'trying' -she wants it just to happen naturally.
My my husband is retiring at the end of this month - I am not ready for this so I'm sure there are going to be a few challenges for me. I must be grateful that he is well though and the reason is not that he is sick.
My nephew is a wellness coach and is trying to help me to feel better. So once again I have been hopeful that I will...but like all the other times that hope has arisen - I am feeling despondent because I can see that there is no improvement. No sugar, wheat, caffeine, dairy, lots of organic healthy foods. Emotions are supposed to be very important -but how to get this healthy?!
I was very productive yesterday - I made 2 x double quantities of a mince dish to freeze meals for my daughter. Also Healthy oats and nut butter squares and dinner for last night. Half way through peeling sweet potatoes for the dinner I ran out of steam. I had no strength to even cut the potato. I guess this is what you ladies mean when you talk about pacing yourself. When I feel ok ( never high on energy, just able to walk around and go out) then I try and act like I am normal - but always hit the wall at some stage!
If I go out in the morning, then the couch it is for the afternoon. It's a silent disease like I've read some of you say - nobody really understands - especially if you manage to get out and about. I am grateful that I can do the things that I do, but the thought of having strength and energy..it must be wonderful. I get the Groundhog Day feeling -every day seems like an effort. I have been sleeping better which is such a blessing -though not waking up refreshed. My parrot is the reason I venture out of bed in the mornings -he needs food! At least he gets me started!
There has been an 11 part series on utube called "the truth about cancer" - they are going to have a re-play soon so if anybody is interested Google "Ty Bollinger - the truth about cancer" and register. Each episode is long, about an hour -but very interesting and informative. Not only for cancer but other illness as well.
Thank you all for the encouragement and support that you offer. We started a series at my cell group this morning called soul wellness. They said if your soul is well you can handle anything that life throws you. I think our mind (thinking)is an enemy of our soul. Always beating up on us... We are so much more than what our thoughts tell us.
Lots of love to you all xxx
I thought I would connect since I seem to have been off the radar for a while. The months are flying by...can you believe we are nearly into May!
I see my last journal entry was me expressing pain over the prospect of no grandchildren - well I am very excited to tell you all that my daughter is pregnant! it's very early days so she is not telling friends yet, but I am! mainly for prayers please that all goes well. She has such a stressful job and is feeling tired, nauseas and blue. Her husband travels a lot and is in Spain at the moment, which doesn't help. This is my younger daughter Jayne who has the polysystic ovarian syndrome. She has been going the natural route and been balancing her hormones as opposed to having meds to help with ovulation. God is good!! Please also pray that my older daughter, Simone, falls pregnant soon -she wants to but doesn't want to be 'trying' -she wants it just to happen naturally.
My my husband is retiring at the end of this month - I am not ready for this so I'm sure there are going to be a few challenges for me. I must be grateful that he is well though and the reason is not that he is sick.
My nephew is a wellness coach and is trying to help me to feel better. So once again I have been hopeful that I will...but like all the other times that hope has arisen - I am feeling despondent because I can see that there is no improvement. No sugar, wheat, caffeine, dairy, lots of organic healthy foods. Emotions are supposed to be very important -but how to get this healthy?!
I was very productive yesterday - I made 2 x double quantities of a mince dish to freeze meals for my daughter. Also Healthy oats and nut butter squares and dinner for last night. Half way through peeling sweet potatoes for the dinner I ran out of steam. I had no strength to even cut the potato. I guess this is what you ladies mean when you talk about pacing yourself. When I feel ok ( never high on energy, just able to walk around and go out) then I try and act like I am normal - but always hit the wall at some stage!
If I go out in the morning, then the couch it is for the afternoon. It's a silent disease like I've read some of you say - nobody really understands - especially if you manage to get out and about. I am grateful that I can do the things that I do, but the thought of having strength and energy..it must be wonderful. I get the Groundhog Day feeling -every day seems like an effort. I have been sleeping better which is such a blessing -though not waking up refreshed. My parrot is the reason I venture out of bed in the mornings -he needs food! At least he gets me started!
There has been an 11 part series on utube called "the truth about cancer" - they are going to have a re-play soon so if anybody is interested Google "Ty Bollinger - the truth about cancer" and register. Each episode is long, about an hour -but very interesting and informative. Not only for cancer but other illness as well.
Thank you all for the encouragement and support that you offer. We started a series at my cell group this morning called soul wellness. They said if your soul is well you can handle anything that life throws you. I think our mind (thinking)is an enemy of our soul. Always beating up on us... We are so much more than what our thoughts tell us.
Lots of love to you all xxx
Replies
Loved this journal, Jamtart!! I am SO thrilled about your daughter\'s pregnancy! Such wonderful news!!! New life coming. How exciting for her after her health struggles. I have prayed that your other daughter will conceive as well. You should have LOTS of grandbabies! They add so much to your life. We have three, and oh goodness, what a love we have for them!!
I\'m sorry you got to feel so much of the dragged out, exhausted part of this illness as of late. It is horrific, isn\'t it? And nobody really understands it when you explain it to them! I\'ve run out of steam peeling many a potato, and I can\'t say that I\'ve ever really learned to pace. It\'s SO important! If we would just do this, we could accomplish more in one day before sending ourselves off to bed! UGH!
I\'m happy for you that your retirement is coming up! Praying for good health for you and your husband so you can begin the next part of your life together..the golden years, the retirement. Ah yes, there will be challanges, but you will do well I just know it!
God bless you, dear one! xo
Hello, dear. I am so thrilled for your whole family that there will be a baby coming. I will hold your daughter and the baby in prayer. This early stage is a complicated time. Things usually calm down a bit in the middle.
I can understand your feeling despondent that your efforts have not shown any benefit yet. It is very frustrating, but I guess you just have to choose what things fit your life and what things seem important to you for being as healthy as you can.
I hope you and your hubby will find ways to accommodate each other in this new stage. I\'m sure it will be odd to have him home all the time, but perhaps it can be a new season of closeness for you two.
Love you loads.
This was a really wonderful journal entry, Jamtart! Thank you for writing and letting us know how you are doing. It HAS been a while, hasn\'t it? What a wonderful thing that your daughter is pregnant after all that effort and wondering if it could happen. What excitement. I do hope you are blessed and that things go perfectly and smoothly. And may the same happen for your other daughter so the first baby will have a cousin!
Oh, the TV show about Cancer: it is very good. I\'ve not seen all of it, but have been catching parts of it when my husband is watching it.
Well, you and your husband will have some things to work out when he is around the house all the time. however, hopefully, he has some hobbies, or is in the process of developing them, so that he is out and about as opposed to following you around like a puppy! It will probably take a few heart to heart conversations about how things are changing in your lives, but it should be a good thing. One of your challenges will be in trying NOT to keep up with him, if he is an energetic person who enjoys keeping busy. You may have to say, \"Sorry, not today or We\'ll do it this morning while i have energy.\"
The pacing thing is very hard. I really try to make myself take breaks and lie down for awhile even when I still have energy. It seems if I get to the \'hit the wall\' place it takes much longer to recover than if I\'d just taken the time to recharge BEFORE hitting the wall and unravelling. I think we still think we can power through and do just one more thing, but we can\'t. That is the bottom line. It\'s a drag, but it is the truth of this illness.
Glad to hear you are sleeping better. That makes such a difference.
And yes, I believe it is true that our minds really do a number on us. The mind is separate from the soul and we need to change the mind nd nourish the soul. I\'ve been reading Buddha\'s Brain lately. IT is good at explaining, as most meditation practices do, that the negative/fearful/catastrophic thinking we do is merely a survival mechanism that is in our brain as a result of evolution. Our negative/scary thoughts are 5 times greater , or more, than our positive thoughts. SO, we are not failures if we don\'t think positively and feel trapped by these thought, but we are merely doong what we were programmed to do to survive. What we DO have control over is changing our thoughts so that we create more, deeper positive grooves in our neural pathways than negative and it becomes more habitual and easy to move toward the positive than the negative. And that is nice to know that we CAN have an impact on our own minds/brains and we are not doomed to doom and gloom! So yes, we are much, much more than our thoughts tell us. That\'s why there is so much love and creativity and humor on this site where there is also so much suffering! Amazing, huh?
Keep hanging in there. Thank you for writing and I hope you begin to see some improvement. Take it slowly. Don\'t push. Even a little gain is a big deal!
HUgs to you,
Denise
Thank you all for reading my journal and for your comments, suggestions and encouragement. Love always xxx