I can't work out if I wish I were still at school or not.
Janie helped me dye my hair on Monday - it was a snap decision on the way home with Alice, and I love it. It's a kind of dark red, and, although it's only a semi-permanent dye, I think I'm going to do it properly after the play; playing Margot, I feel as though I should have a sort-of natural hair colour for both nights, but I'll probably do it after it's over. I can't believe the play's in two weeks! None of the cast feel ready - and I'm not surprised. Still, back to my hair - it's made me so confident! And I look so much older with it as well. I've been straightening it, and I just look really alternative and cool, and it's a lot easier to do stuff with as well. I'll be sad when it starts to fade, but it'll be back with a vengeance at the start of April. I'm also considering a dark purple, so I'm either going to have purple or red hair. I guess it's just up to me.
As far as Dan goes, I can't seem to work out how I feel. I mean, I love him. Of course I love him - it's just that everything he does seems to annoy me recently. Maybe I'm just a little tetchy. The idea of anything sexual repulses me right now, though. I don't know what's going on with me - I feel so empty and broken whenever I'm alone, but I'm also energetic and I'm the same as ever around my friends. Right now, I want to break everything that I've had for more than three years and just start over, but I know I'll regret it if I do.
One day, Kitty, I'm going to snap. I'm getting more and more irrational as time goes on right now, and I'm scaring myself.