Dear Kitty,
it would seem that my fears are unfounded. I got a letter from Dan today that he'd written just after I left on Saturday. You remember how I said he was going to go to the Hague?
'You ask me to go to the Hague, and I tell you I won't. Yes, it's a cool sounding plan; to move to Holland and study art. But that was it's chief appeal - it sounded like a cool thing to do, or, more accurately, it sounded like something the person I wanted to be would do. The course itself is neither better nor worse than any of those I'm looking at now.
Life has furnished me with a concern greater than that of my own vanity - you. And I'm afraid I'm rather in love with you, and that's something I take seriously.'
He later writes about the future.
'Yes, it's only been ten weeks. Perhaps it's absurd to be thinking further than six months ahead, but I look at you and, unlike with Rosie or Lauren, the thought that we could be together in three, four, five years time doesn't terrify me, and I don't want to do anything that could get in the way of that.'
I still worry that I'm not enough for him, that one day he'll wake up and realise that I'm not someone he wants to be with. I'm scared that he's writing this now, but in a month or so, none of it will ring true any more. But, at the moment, we feel the same way about each other.
'I feel pretty low this evening - you've left quite a hole, taken something essential with you - but this is as it should be. I'm not ready to start teaching myself how to live without you yet.'
Yours,
Chessie
it would seem that my fears are unfounded. I got a letter from Dan today that he'd written just after I left on Saturday. You remember how I said he was going to go to the Hague?
'You ask me to go to the Hague, and I tell you I won't. Yes, it's a cool sounding plan; to move to Holland and study art. But that was it's chief appeal - it sounded like a cool thing to do, or, more accurately, it sounded like something the person I wanted to be would do. The course itself is neither better nor worse than any of those I'm looking at now.
Life has furnished me with a concern greater than that of my own vanity - you. And I'm afraid I'm rather in love with you, and that's something I take seriously.'
He later writes about the future.
'Yes, it's only been ten weeks. Perhaps it's absurd to be thinking further than six months ahead, but I look at you and, unlike with Rosie or Lauren, the thought that we could be together in three, four, five years time doesn't terrify me, and I don't want to do anything that could get in the way of that.'
I still worry that I'm not enough for him, that one day he'll wake up and realise that I'm not someone he wants to be with. I'm scared that he's writing this now, but in a month or so, none of it will ring true any more. But, at the moment, we feel the same way about each other.
'I feel pretty low this evening - you've left quite a hole, taken something essential with you - but this is as it should be. I'm not ready to start teaching myself how to live without you yet.'
Yours,
Chessie
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