Dear Kitty,
apart from missing Alex (shut up, Chessie), I've been thinking about the future a lot recently.
Faith has been an enormous part of my life for the last four and a half years or so, and, now that I'm here in Paris, my belief in God seems to be getting stronger every day. I've spent a lot of time thinking, and I understand that God has a plan for me - I may not know that plan, and I may not think it's the right thing when it does happen, but God does what He knows is right.
This seems irrelevant. I am getting to the point now.
When I was twelve or so, my godmother sent me a book on girls who became missionaries, and, despite not being a Christian back then, it put some ideas into my head that I haven't forgotten. The other night, I suddenly realised that I wasn't sure if I was in the right place, and I'm wondering if I ought to be working somewhere else, where my help is really necessary - such as volunteering, or working with deaf-blind children. The latter idea came into my head about six months ago and has refused to leave, and I'm wondering - is that what God really wants me to do?
Every day, I feel like I ought to be doing more with my faith, and helping those who need help. Here, I'm not doing that, and I'm becoming more resentful and self-centered as time goes by.
None of this makes sense now that I read it back, but I needed to 'splurge' about this somehow. I'm going to Corsica this weekend, and I plan to spend as much of my free time as possible thinking about this. Maybe my new sketchbook will help.
Yours,
Chessie
apart from missing Alex (shut up, Chessie), I've been thinking about the future a lot recently.
Faith has been an enormous part of my life for the last four and a half years or so, and, now that I'm here in Paris, my belief in God seems to be getting stronger every day. I've spent a lot of time thinking, and I understand that God has a plan for me - I may not know that plan, and I may not think it's the right thing when it does happen, but God does what He knows is right.
This seems irrelevant. I am getting to the point now.
When I was twelve or so, my godmother sent me a book on girls who became missionaries, and, despite not being a Christian back then, it put some ideas into my head that I haven't forgotten. The other night, I suddenly realised that I wasn't sure if I was in the right place, and I'm wondering if I ought to be working somewhere else, where my help is really necessary - such as volunteering, or working with deaf-blind children. The latter idea came into my head about six months ago and has refused to leave, and I'm wondering - is that what God really wants me to do?
Every day, I feel like I ought to be doing more with my faith, and helping those who need help. Here, I'm not doing that, and I'm becoming more resentful and self-centered as time goes by.
None of this makes sense now that I read it back, but I needed to 'splurge' about this somehow. I'm going to Corsica this weekend, and I plan to spend as much of my free time as possible thinking about this. Maybe my new sketchbook will help.
Yours,
Chessie
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