Dear Kitty,           I'm terrified. I've never been this close to anyone before. I know that he's one of my best friends, but I've never ever known anyone this well...had anyone ever understand me. And it scares me more than I can say. It's like there are two versions of me; the ordinary girl at school and then there's...well, my 'other side'. Nobody else has ever even met my other side, really. And now it's like all my emotional barriers have been broken down...and that's what scares me most. If I let someone ever actually know me, if I ever let anyone get that close, and then if they were to leave me...I can't deal with that. That's why I just can't talk about things; I want to, I'd love to be able to...but I just can't. I'm just too scared that...oh, I don't know anymore.            Kitty, I just don't know what to do anymore. I want to go and do it again so much that I'm shaking as I try to hold off...but I don't know if it'll actually work, no matter what I do.I'll write as soon as I can.Francesca