Dear Kitty,             I really did mean every word that I said in the last entry. Really and honestly I did. And Hector is being so nice...even though I really don't deserve it. But he's such a sweet guy. And I do feel seriously guilty still at the moment because, no matter how many times I'm told that it isn't my fault and that it was just taken the wrong way, I know that it was all because of me. I've been such a prick recently.              But still, Hector is being so sweet, and is probably my closest friend (yes, Isla and Charly are very close, but they don't know half of me...); he is actually the nicest guy ever. I really can't thank him enough for being such a nice guy.              And, contrary to what Fraser may think, I do want to be friends again. I don't think things'll ever be the same between us again...but I have to try.              Hopefully, tonight really will be the first night since Tuesday that I don't do anything. I think that I have another bruise on my head...I did anything to try not to cut mysel last night. Sort of worked...I guess. Meant I didn't sleep until about half twelve again, though. Oh well. What's the loss of a few hours sleep compared to everything else?I'll write again soon.Love from,MexxxxxxxP.S. I don't know if head banging counts...or slamming fingers in a door...but, if it does, then it's been about twenty three hours. Otherwise, it's been...hmmm...about forty five hours, I think. But I don't have a clue; my maths is terrible. Oh dear.