Day 3

The tears haven't stopped. Every time I see something relating to weddings or honeymoons, I think about just how close I was to spending my life with the greatest man on Earth . But I have to find a way to move on. I've lost a lot of weight in the last few days. I stressed myself out so bad I had to go to Urgent Care after work. I don't want to say what for because it's too much information. It gave me a real scare, and I have to follow up with the doctor. If I as a cheater am already having health issues from this, I can only wonder what my ex is going through  Oh I cry so much thinking about the pain he is in. Why is life so complicated for some of us? I seriously do not want to live anymore. I wonder if antidepressants will help or would I swallow the whole bottle in a suicide attempt.