Forgiveness
I've been thinking a lot about forgiveness. I've asked God to forgive me for all that I did wrong in my marriage. But I can't expect forgiveness if I won't forgive my wife.I still love her and when I think of her I think of how she was not how she is now. A small part of that still exists in her I know.I want t forgive her and someday I promise I will. I just can't do it right now. I'm too hurt.For now all I can do is say I used to love her more than I do now.
Replies
I know how you feel. I\'m a bit further along than you and I also feel that forgiveness, if it happens, is a future thing.
I was talking to someone the other day and she mentioned that she knows a couple who divorced completely amicably. They were friendly about it and remain friendly about everything. It\'s hard for me to imagine it.
I told her that I will not rule out that sort of relationship in the future, but it will take a good long time to get there, if ever. A lot of it depends on the people involved, but also on how things ended, what happened, etc. So maybe. Maybe someday. But I\'m not focusing on it now. Now is about recovery and a new life without the person who decided to throw me away.
Everybody approaches this pain in different ways. If forgiveness will help you, seek it. But be realistic. And I think it\'s reasonable to put it off for now, and think of it as something you aspire to down the road, when the acute pain has receded.
Best wishes.